Of Mirth and Musings

New Blog, Update Your Situations

2011-06-13T15:01:00.002-06:00

I started a new blog here: http://ofmirthandmusings.tumblr.com/

Waste Not Want Not

2010-05-12T21:10:00.000-06:00

As a poor, I have to make my food last. Especially when that food comes from the farmer's market. (I have been known to accuse nearly every farmer's market vendor of ripping me off - not to their face, of course.) This week, we treated ourselves to a $2.00 bunch of beets. It wasn't a total rip, but only because I know how to make it last.

I am not even going to mention how I loathe beet-haters, which would surely turn into a blog-long rant. Haters are simply wrong.

For beets, we use everything but the squeal. The greens are turned into pesto, and the beets are roasted. Recipes follow.

Beet Greens Pesto

Ingredients:

Greens, including stems, from one bunch of beets

8 cloves garlic

One handful (approx. 3/4-1 cup) almonds, or any other kind of nut besides peanuts

Olive oil, probably 1/3 cup or so

Salt

Freshly ground black pepper

Method:

This makes about 1.5 cups of pesto.

Put everything but the olive oil and salt in a food processor.

Drizzle about 2 tbsp olive oil on top.

Process until pesto-like.

Scrap down the sides, and add more olive oil if necessary, and process again.

You are looking for a pesto-like consistency - some like it more liquidy than others, so the amount of olive oil used is up to you.

Taste it. If it isn't salty enough, add some salt. Beet greens are naturally salty, so you might find you don't need any more salt.

This pesto makes a great cracker topping, and is delicious added to mashed potatoes.

It doesn't taste like beets, so if you cry at the thought of eating beets, be quiet and eat this.

Beet Greens Aioli

Ingredients:

Beet greens pesto

Mayo

Method:

Combine equal parts beet greens pesto and mayo.

Spread on anything you'd put mayo on.

Makes a good dip too.

Cinchy Roasted Beets

Ingredients:

One bunch of beets, washed with stems and roots chopped off

A drizzle of olive oil (about 1 tbsp)

Salt

Pepper

Method:

Preheat toaster oven to 400.

Cut beets into squares/wedges, about 1 inch square or so.

Put in baking dish.

Drizzle with olive oil, and add a bit of salt and pepper. Be careful not to add too much salt. I'd start with four shakes, and then add more once I tasted them if necessary.

Cook for 40 minutes, until soft but not super soft.

Bike Theft Thwarted

2010-05-01T16:58:00.000-06:00

The manager at our apartment complex, Dorris, has been on a crusade to get all the bikes that no one ever uses out of here. There are bikes locked up along the stairs all over. Tons of bikes. Some people move and never take their bikes, so some are just abandoned. Some bikes get so rusty with the salty sea air that they are unusable. All people with a bike they actually use had to put a yellow tag on it, so Dorris would know not to get rid of it.

I tagged my bike a few weeks ago.

Yesterday, I happened upon Dorris while I was doing laundry. She mentioned that they were getting rid of all the abandoned bikes. I looked at my bike. Rather, I looked at the spot where my bike used to be.

I say, "my bike is gone." Dorris knew I had tagged it, so she starts frantically trying to find the people (scum lords) who were in charge of getting rid of (selling, hawking, trading for illegal things) the abandoned bikes.

I followed Dorris to the other side of the complex, and luckily we found the truck with the bikes on it. Dorris said, "that's her bike!" The guy on the truck said, "which one?" Dorris said, "the one with the yellow tag on it!" Morons.

So, they got my bike off the truck and Dorris got pissed at the woman (scum) who was in charge of the bike round up. The woman (scum) insisted she TRIPLE checked to make sure she wasn't taking any bikes that belonged to people. Somehow, my bike, with the yellow tag, got taken anyway. Strange. My bike was three minutes away from being taken to who knows where, never to be seen again. I had already decided I was going to demand $450 if it was gone.

Then, I told the woman (scum) that I wanted my cable back because it was a $45 cable. She told me she would give me a new one that was worth "way, way more" than that. Dorris said I'd have to approve whatever cable she gave me, or else she'd have to buy me a new one. Dorris told her I am an attorney. The woman (scum) said she was sorry, and I said it was okay. Anyone else, my old man included, would have made her regret the day she even thought about loading my bike on that truck. She's lucky it was me.

Later that day, when I went to get my dry clothes, I saw my cable slung over a couple of beach cruisers that the woman (scum) had claimed as her own, as they had been abandoned by others. It wasn't locked up. So, I took back my cable. I wonder if she was going to give me my own cable and then say that it was worth "way, way more" than it was?

She was supposed to give me my new cable and lock last night, but never did. Surprise, surprise. This is what happens when you send a scum bag to do an idiot's job.

Enumerating

2010-04-30T10:42:00.000-06:00

I started my stupid Census Enumerator job. Training was awful and boring, obviously.

The only good things about this job are: (a) I'm getting paid way more than I'm worth; (b) I'm on my own the whole day so I don't have some idiot youth telling me what to do all the time and I don't have to fake smile throughout my entire shift; and, (c) my area is the street I live on, so I can come home and eat whenever I'm hungry.

However. Everyone who answers the door instantly hates me. They have no reason to, I am purely nice, I am crazy fast at asking them the questions I have to ask, and it is their own fault I'm there since they didn't mail back their Census form.

People try to tell me they don't have time to answer the questions (which seriously takes less than five minutes). I then tell them I will have to keep coming back until I get my form filled out, and I live across the street so I can seriously come back at ANY time. Then, they refuse to tell me a time to come back and just say to come back "later." Annoyings.

If they don't say they have no time, they act like the fact I am asking them these questions is the most horrible thing one person could ever even think of doing to another person. They are in pure torture. It's not like it's fun for me either. Jerks.

All I need to find out is how many people lived at these places on April 1. Then, I need the names, sexes, ages, and races of each person. That's it.

The Test

2010-04-13T18:55:00.001-06:00

There has been a request for me to tell the story of the census job test.

All one has to do to be a census enumerator is call a number, then take a test. And pass the test, I assume. My test was at the Ocean Beach Recreation Center.

I walked in to the room and saw the dregs of society. I prejudged them, and decided they were all scum bags. Then, I felt bad, and decided that maybe they were all just in a tough time like me, and they just needed any kind of job to get by until something real comes along. So, I gave them a chance.

The man in charge gave us a form to fill out, with our name, address, availability, and a spot for us to write in any crimes we have been convicted of. It took us two hours to fill out this form. He went down the list of things to fill out, one by one, making sure everyone understood what they were supposed to write. It would have taken me maybe two minutes to fill this form out unsupervised.

As soon as we got to the part about confessing to our crimes, everyone starts asking the man in charge if their specific convictions count as something they need to put down. Everyone but me, of course. He said, yes, every conviction needs to be written down or else they'll find it on the background check and think you were hiding it. Everyone still wanted to explain their situation and see if it had to be confessed. It was excruciating.

This was the point where I gave up on this lot, and decided my original prejudging was correct.

Test time! We had 30 minutes to answer about 25 questions. These questions require the reading, math, and analytical skills of maybe a third grader. An American third grader. I finished in about 15 minutes, but we weren't allowed to leave when we were done so I just had to sit there.

Only one other person finished the test.

When the 30 minutes was up, the man in charge collected our tests and said that he needed to talk to some of us because we didn't fill out our forms (the ones with our names, addresses, and convictions) correctly. "Some of us" turned out to be everyone but two people. Every single person (there were about 20 of us) couldn't fill out this cinchy form correctly, except for me and one other older woman.

We were finally excused. I was so depressed. Where had I gone wrong? What decision was the one that led me to this point - to be in this room with these people? How can so many people be so stupid? They can't finish a test that a third grader would breeze through, how can I live in a society where it is acceptable for people to be walking around that dumb? Why are people content to be dumb, it doesn't take that much effort to understand simple concepts?

You can look at a practice test, which is almost the exact same as the real test, on the census website. Just Google it if you're interested to see if I am exaggerating. I assure you, I'm not.

The Census

2010-04-07T20:28:00.000-06:00

No word on the Saipan opportunity yet. It's probably safe to assume I didn't get it. For the record, we would have gone. It was nice to think I actually had a chance at something. For once. "Hi ho."

I got hired to be a census enumerator. That is a fancy way of saying a currently unemployed dirt bag who is willing to do anything (anything) for $16.50/hour. The story of when I took the test to decide whether I was qualified to be an enumerator is far to long for this forum. The short story is: almost all people applying for this job are (supposedly) former criminals, and other people who are otherwise unemployable. And me.

Training starts April 19. Four days of training, nine hours a day. Assuming we get an hour break, to make it eight hours a day, that makes $528 of your tax dollars going straight into my pocket . And all I have to do is sit in a room and be treated like a kindergartner who can't understand how to knock on people's doors and ask them their race and age. The Man has decided it will take 32 hours to get me to an acceptable skill level to do this job. God bless America.

I really don't want to do this job. Really really. Any job that pays $16.50/hour and requires no actual skills or education has got to be a job so horrible the only way they can get anyone to do it is to offer that kind of money. It is going to be death.

But, I've got April's rent paid, and my bank account is now at zero. Still no credit card debt, but I'm not in a good spot. So, I truly have no choice. Either SOMEONE calls me back and accepts my application for an attorney position, or starting April 19, I am an enumerator. God bless America.

In other news, I got my California Bar card in the mail today. So, everything is official. Can't wait to show the other losers in my training group.

The Problem of Saipan

2010-03-19T18:20:00.000-06:00

A long time ago, like in January or December, I applied for a judicial clerkship in Saipan. Saipan is the largest island in the Northern Mariana Islands - a United States-owned commonwealth just east of the Philippines, north of Australia. The island is 12 miles long and 6 miles wide. I applied for this job for two main reasons: (1) I was desperate and frustrated that I couldn't find work in the U.S. and decided, fine, if no one here wants me, I'll just leave; (2) a judicial clerkship is pretty much the best experience a new attorney can have, it almost guarantees any job that is applied for after.

The start date was April. Since it is now the end-ish of March, and I hadn't heard peep, I assumed I didn't get the job. Then, today my old man gets a call from the judge while I was at the gym. But, he didn't realize a judge was calling (he has an accent) so when I got home he told me someone from the census job I applied for called.

I called this person back, thinking I was talking to some census lackey, only to find out I was in the midst of a job interview with a judge!

He told me I am in his top five, and the start date is still April. So, if I'm offered this position, I will be leaving the country crazily soon. For two years.

Of course, I should have nothing to worry about until I find out if I even get this job, but I am having major anxiety over the thought of having to decide to accept the position or not. I want to throw up.

The good: I'll get about $52,000/year, including the housing stipend (this may not sound like much for a lawyer, but that is basically the equivalent of a million dollars to me); I get about 42 paid days off each year so I'll be able to travel to Japan, Bali, Phillipines, Thailand, Australia, New Zealand, etc. - something I will likely never have another chance to do; I'll get good work experience and by the time I come back to the U.S. there will probably be jobs that want me; I'll be able to afford to live in an actual house with multiple rooms instead of a teensy apartment; I'll still live at the beach; it's a federal government job, so I'd be in with the government which gives the best benefits for future jobs.

The bad: I will be away from the mainland for two years, which is a crazily long time. To think I was only in Denver for four months, and I was so so lonely - the thought of two years is too much to bear. So, the only way I'd do it is if my old man came with me. The only problem with that is he has a year left of school, so he'd have to put that on hold for two years for my sake. Thus, I would have to live with the guilt of making him give something up because of me. And, I either won't get to see my family for two years, or will only get to see them if they come visit me (which I would force them to do). But, because it is such a small island, it takes 2-3 days to get there depending on the various layovers. And, I'll have to buy all new stuff because I can't take my stuff with me that far. And, what will I do with the stuff I have now? Just get rid of it, or store it? And, do they have weird deadly tropical diseases there? And, this decision will have to be made in less than 2 weeks. Less than 2 weeks to decide the rest of my life!

So, now I don't know what to do and I'm kind of hoping I will find out I didn't get the job just so I don't have to decide. What should I do?

Common Decency

2010-03-17T18:17:00.000-06:00

Most who know me know I am obsessed with Kurt Vonnegut. As an author, and a person. I wish I could have been his best friend. I hate that he died before getting to see GW's reign of terror end. I agree with everything he has ever said, and wish I had the talent to say things as perfectly as he did.

He has a quote, from the prologue of Slapstick, that I've always remembered for whatever reason: "I wish that people who are conventionally supposed to love each other would say to each other, when they fight, "Please — a little less love, and a little more common decency.""

I didn't get the video game tester job. I called and emailed the contact person several times, and never got a reply. I wish for a little more common decency from people who are supposed to be professionals. And, I wasn't expecting to get the job for no good reason either. I was told, by the person who interviewed me, to email this other person and tell them "Leesa has approved me for training and I am available to start at any time." To me, this basically means I have the job. To them, it means nothing. Jerks.

This whole economy situation makes me feel so weird. Like, I NEVER expected this is where I would be, nearly one year after graduating from law school WITH HONORS. But then, there are so many other people in this boat with me...it is so weird. It is weird for me to have a problem that I don't have an answer to. It is weird for me to wrap my head around the fact that working crazily hard and doing everything I'm supposed to do hasn't worked out - and tons of people are going through the same thing. But then I think, maybe it is weird to expect things to be exactly as I envisioned them in ONLY one year - is one year really that long? I don't know. I've never done this before.

I'm with the alcoholics on this one, taking it one day at a time. "Hi ho."

Why Try Bean Dip

2010-03-07T14:51:00.001-07:00

In my language, "why try" translates to "white trash." This way, I can tell people who speak my language that someone/thing is white trash without the person/thing knowing how much of a jerk I am. Example: I see a full-grown woman wearing a one-piece bathing suit and shorts as an actual outfit, and say "why try alert." Thus, this is a recipe for white trash bean dip.

I think every suburban white has some white trash in them, myself included. The white trash element that I struggle the most to suppress is the craving for over-processed junk food. I love all chips, dips, and frozen novelties. When I was little, my grandma would give me pork rinds, and I loved them because I didn't know what they were. Yet, I deny myself all these pleasures in an attempt to be healthy and un-white trash. This recipe allows me to give in to these desires and still have some respect for myself.

Frito bean dip is pretty much the pâté of the white trash party. I love it. But, for $3-5 for a 9 oz. can, it is a total rip. And, they put a bunch of stuff in it that isn't healthy or necessary for the home cook (corn oil, maltodextrin). This recipe is fat-free, cheap, and will be the hit of any party - white trash or otherwise. Adapted from this recipe.

Ingredients:

2 cups fat-free refried beans (make your own like a true poor person, or use a 15 oz. can)

7 slices pickled jalepenos (nacho slices)

1 tablespoon brine from jalepeno slices

1/2 tsp salt

1/2 tsp sugar

1/4 tsp onion powder

1/4 tsp paprika

1/4 tsp chipotle powder (or any chili powder)

1/8 tsp garlic powder

1/8 tsp cayenne powder (more if you want it inferno style)

Method:

Put all ingredients in a food processor.

Puree on high until smooth.

Cover and chill at least one hour before serving.

Recipe can be doubled, and should be if you're taking this to a party.

Prospects

2010-03-02T21:07:00.000-07:00

Today I applied for (and interviewed for) a job as a video game tester for Playstation. It was one of those mass hiring things where they say they'll be at said location for a certain amount of time and everyone who needs a job just shows up and hopes. I think my chances are good. They said they're hiring a lot of people, and I play video games a lot now that I don't have a job, so I have the experience necessary to do it.

It only pays $9/hour. But, it would be 40+ hours a week. And, it would be a contract for about a month. So, if I hate it, at least I'd know I only have to do it for one month. And, working 40 hours/week at $9/hour for a month will give me enough to keep looking for a real job in the meantime. Or, if I like it, I would probably have the chance to renew my contract.

Part of the job would be "putting in hours." Apparently, every game needs to be played for a certain number of hours before it can be released. So, I'd just have to play whatever game all day, every day, over and over.

Part of the job would be looking for bugs and glitches in games, and recording them and what I did to make it happen, and if I was able to replicate the glitch. This bug-finding could mean playing one small part of a game over and over and over for days on end. Which would suck.

They could also tell us things like "play level one without killing any guys" and then we'd have to do that, and record what happens. They sometimes use us to tell them if a part is too hard or too easy or whatever.

So, it sounds like there could be some cool days and some really boring and horrible days. But, it will pay the bills, and that's the main thing because I'm getting close to the bottom of my barrel.

Cinch-A-Pinch Salsa

2010-02-25T19:09:00.001-07:00

Our favorite snack is chips and salsa. It is also a guilty pleasure, since tortilla chips are our main source of junk food. It's the only junk food item we have in stock all the time.

This salsa is cinchy to make, with only five ingredients. It is cheaper to make than store-bought, and tastes better than the best salsa you've ever had. There's no cilantro in it because I can't stand the taste/smell/thought of cilantro (have you heard, some scientists think cilantro-hating is genetic?). You can add it to yours though, if you insist.

There are only two sure-fire ways to ruin this recipe: Add too much onion, or too much garlic. If you think you'd like more than I say to use, try it my way first and then add more if you don't like it.

Ingredients:

four medium/large tomatoes

one serrano pepper

(use one jalepeno if you want it mild, use two serranos if you want it del inferno)

half of a small white or yellow onion

one clove garlic

juice from one lime

one teaspoon salt

Method:

Cut everything except the lime and salt into pieces small enough to fit into your food processor. Pulse until it is the way you like it. Pour into a bowl, and add the salt and lime juice. Stir it up. Let it chill out in the fridge for at least an hour before serving. Will last at least a week in the fridge, and can also be frozen - but for how long, I know not.

Too spicy for you? Try adding more tomatoes. Or, you can use it as an ingredient in chili or soup or anything that calls for a can of Rotel tomatoes.

The Lay Off

2010-02-22T11:27:00.000-07:00

As you know, I used to deliver pizza at Round Table. On New Year's Eve, I was laid off. They sold the store to another pizza company, and we closed that same day. Here is how it went down:

10:30-ish p.m., December 30: I get a text message saying there is an important meeting the next morning, and everyone has to be there at 9:00 a.m.

9:00 a.m., December 31: We're told the store has been sold, and as of today we're closed.

They knew the sale was likely to happen for months, but didn't bother telling us until all the papers were signed. Our general manager didn't even know.

So, since then I haven't had a job. And, I don't qualify for Unemployment because I wasn't working there long enough (I was there five months). Still looking for legal work, but I haven't had a single interview or call-back in nine months of sending out applications.

Attention Obama: I've slipped through the cracks of government aid and I foolishly went to law school instead of road-building school, so create some jobs for something I can do. I'd make a great Think Tank member.

Sustenance

2010-02-21T12:53:00.002-07:00

The food budget is the most important part of being poor. One cannot be poor and feel good about it unless a healthy yet cheap, delicious, and varied diet is involved.

Our food budget for two people is $200. Per month. We eat like kings.

I'm in charge of the food budget around here. Not because I am the more domestic one, but because Adam can't concentrate at the store. He could go there to buy cereal, and honestly spend two hours in the cereal aisle staring at boxes, comparing every detail of each one. If he doesn't have a list, he will wander around the store (again, for hours) trying to figure out what we need.

Three main factors go into keeping our food budget so low and healthful: (1) no deal = no deal, (2) skip pre-made stuff, (3) rarely eat out.

(1) I buy food at three different places on Wednesdays in order to get the best deals. Henry's has their sales from the previous week, and the sales from the new week in effect on Wednesdays. Then, I go to Vons to get the stuff I couldn't get at Henry's. I only buy things on sale, or if I have a coupon. But, I like to double dip and save my coupons until the desired item is also on sale. All our meals are based on what is on sale, which normally is the same as what is in season. Last, I go to the farmer's market by our house to get vegetables and fruit.

(2) The bulk of our purchases are dried goods (beans, lentils, rice, split peas, oats, flour) and fruits/vegetables. We don't buy any canned stuff, that counts as pre-made. I buy a 10lb bag of dry pinto beans at Costco for about $15. Ten pounds of pinto beans makes over 150 1/2 cup servings. One can of prepared pinto beans costs $1.25-ish on sale, and has only 4 servings. Not only are we saving money, we're saving tons of energy that is wasted by canning the beans and transporting them to the store. And, we're saving the can. And, we're not consuming all the sodium and preservatives and other weird chemicals that are in that can of beans. Everyone wins.

You're probably thinking "So what, who would want to eat 150 servings of pinto beans. Boring." I turn those beans into burritos, tacos, chimichangas, taco salad, and veggie burgers. And, it is all really good. We often say that if we got our meal in a restaurant we would be freaking out and telling people that it is the best restaurant ever. It is all about being creative with what you can afford. Like I said, we eat like kings.

We make our own bread, muffins, soups, pasta sauce, beer..anything one would buy already-made from a store we make from scratch. We actually know what all the ingredients in our food are. We are old school.

(3) We eat out about once a week. But, "out" usually means a take-out type place where you order and then sit down and wait for them to call you - not a sit-down restaurant. So, our "out" meal is usually less than $10, and it is usually In-N-Out or a taco shop. We go to a sit-down restaurant maybe once a month or so. It's rare to go out because we can make everything we like better than a restaurant can. And, it isn't hard to cook so don't try giving me that old excuse. If you follow the recipe and learn some basic cooking skills (the most important is being able to tell how hot to have your pan, and you'll naturally learn that the more you cook - the rest is all cinchy) you can make all your favorite meals for way way cheaper than going out.

I eat tastier food and more healthful food now than I ever have before. I am more poor than I have ever been before. If I hadn't been this poor, I probably would have never known how much better (in every way) homemade everything is. When I have money someday, I'm still going to eat like a poor person. Except, the word for a well-off person who eats this good is a "gourmet."

Announcement: New Theme

2010-02-18T11:32:00.000-07:00

Notice the new blog name. Did you know almost 60% of people will live at least one year below the poverty line between the ages of 25 and 75? The poverty line (as used to defer federal loans based on economic hardship) for a family of two in California is $1100 per month. Obviously, I'm below that line. But, it isn't as bad as the word "poverty" makes it seem - as long as you don't have kids or anyone else relying on you.

We aren't living in squalor or anything. We have a cupboard and a little fridge full of food, we aren't starving. A few months ago, when I still had a job, we got a new TV. In January, we took a little trip up to Portland to visit our buds (booked when I had a job). Sure, I know the exact day I will run out of money, but it definitely isn't bad.

But, the reason we can afford to do that stuff and be okay even though we have no income is because we've embraced being poor. We don't buy stuff we can't afford or don't need. We have no credit card debt.

I've been poor so long now, poor is a part of my identity. And, I think everyone could use a little poor in them (uh oh, smells like a socialist to me!). Being poor has taught me a lot, and that is the new theme of this web log.

I Passed!

2009-11-20T19:42:00.001-07:00

Yippee!

Here's To The Next Chapter

2009-11-19T12:07:00.003-07:00

Yes, I'm still here. Just haven't felt like posting. Everything is boring here.

My unofficial father-in-law, Chaz, died from lymphoma a month ago. Only two months after being diagnosed. It is a fucked disease. He loved Reese's Peanut Butter Cups, going to the movies, and running ridiculously long distances in the mountains. He hated barking dogs, Mad TV, and the thought of peeing in a container from bed even if it meant he didn't have to walk to the toilet. He was a genius (complete with crazy quirks), he was stubborn, and he had a great sense of humor. He knew everything about computers, but didn't own one. He once told me he was a technophobe, and I think that was true. You should've seen his microwave - I think it was a prototype one before real microwaves even were truly invented. I'm grateful I got to know him. He had a lot of living left to do, and I'm glad my old man shares a lot of his dad's good qualities (even if it means he also shares that Chaz Stubbornness).

Tomorrow I find out if I passed the CA bar. I've 95% convinced myself that I passed. I had to of passed. If I didn't, dark days are ahead. So, I had to.

If I passed, I get sworn in on December 1. I have to take an oath of professional conduct. Which seems like a joke since every lawyer I've ever heard of breaks every professional conduct rule like it's nothing. People should know, I will TRULY be an honest lawyer. And, I don't need to take a stupid pointless oath to prove that. It's the only way I can imagine being.

If I passed, I can start seriously looking for a real job. The environmental law market is non-existent, so I'm just going to apply for every law job there is and hope I either (a) find something new to love or (b) get enough experience from whatever it is to get me an environmental law job.

Here's to the next chapter.

Altercation With The Baby

2009-09-03T19:07:00.000-06:00

I just got home from work, and I'm fuming. My old man isn't home to hear about it, so you have to.

The time is 4:45, and I get a call for a delivery order. This is only my third delivery call of the day, which beats my one delivery for Wednesday. So, I take the order, go back and make the pizzas.

The time is 5:10. I was supposed to be off at 5:00, but of course am going to take this delivery before I go. Just as I'm loading up the second pizza of the order into my delivery bag, the night shift driver walks in. Yes, The Baby (see previous post for background on The Baby). He looks at my delivery and says "you're off, so I'll take that one."

I'm thinking: you've got to be fucking kidding me if you think you're taking this. I say to the assistant manager: do you want me to take this, or should I just go home? He is a little bitch baby who doesn't want to stand up to this fuck, so he says: you guys figure it out, I'm working on something else.

So I say to The Baby: Okay, I'm taking it. As I go to print up the address and everything, he throws a legal fit. Like, two year old style. Practically on the ground writhing.

I say: I've only had two deliveries all day, I took the order, I made the pizzas, it's only 5:10 - I'm taking it.

He says "okay, you take it" and continues to throw his baby fit. He says how I'm taking money away from him now, and he doesn't care that I only had two deliveries because I'm the day driver, and that's my shift, so that's my fault not his. He says that maybe he'll only get four deliveries all night. He says that I was off at 5:00, so I can't take it. He says a bunch of other baby stuff. He is 43 years old.

The whole time he's ranting, I don't say peep. I already said my piece, and I've learned from watching parents dealing with two year olds throwing fits - you just have to let them cry and cry and ignore them.

The assistant manager was standing right there the whole time this is going down, and he doesn't say peep either. Like a coward.

Then, I get back from my delivery and, luckily, The Baby is gone. The assistant manager is all acting like he was on my side, saying what an asshole The Baby is and everything. I'm thinking "gee, thanks for standing up for me and saying something instead of just standing there like an idiot."

I find out The Baby had fourteen deliveries last night. Fourteen. That's like a million dollars. I don't think I've even taken fourteen deliveries in the entire 1.5 weeks I've been there. I'm sure I haven't.

And, The Baby wasn't even supposed to start his shift until 6:00, he just came in at 5:00 because he knew I was off then and thought he'd take my tips for that hour in between shifts. Fucker.

So, tomorrow I think I'm going to talk to the GM and tell him this is the second run-in I've had with The Baby and request that he schedules me right up until 6:00 so this can't happen again. I think I'll also ask him to give The Baby a talkin' to. I am livid.

Tipping Revelation/Revolution

2009-09-02T12:15:00.003-06:00

I have strong opinions when it comes to tips and tipping. Now that I think of it, I have strong opinions when it comes to everything. But, that is neither here nor there.

In CA, minimum wage is $8.00. People who work "tip-based" jobs (such as bar tenders, servers, deliver drivers) get paid minimum wage on top of their tips - unlike some other states where tip-based people get like a $2.00 wage or something crazy plus tips. In those states, of course, tipping is fine and necessary for people to live.

But, people in CA with tip-based jobs are getting paid way more than they are worth - in my opinion. Bar tenders end up making more money than teachers. Teachers! Actually, the night delivery drivers at my pizza place probably end up making more than teachers too. That is retarded.

In fact, they probably end up making more than non-profit lawyers!

Is tending bar, delivery driving, or serving people food really worth all the money these guys are making? No way! Do they have any kind of special skill or education to warrant that kind of money-making? No way! Do they even share their tips with the bar backs and bussers and cooks and dishwashers and everyone else who makes their job possible? No way! That is retarded.

I know, I know, they'll say that dealing with customers is the most horrible fate anyone could ever imagine, so they deserve the tips. In rebuttal - go to school or get a skill and get a real job if you hate waiting tables so much. If tipping was banned, I know there are people who would still do the job for just the $8.00/hr. So stop whining, greedy babies.

For these reasons I'm anti-tipping, in CA. People should get paid what they're worth, and people who get tips are getting so over-paid for the jobs they're doing. But, yes, I still leave the standard tip amount because it has become like a crime to not leave a tip - even if you get shitty service and the food is gross, you're still expected to tip. Stupid.

Maybe people should get tips if they actually do something above and beyond. Maybe.

Now, I have a tip-based job. Does this change my tips opinion? No way. I get paid $8.00/hr to deliver pizzas. That's my job, and I do my job and get the wage that a job of that skill level (no skills at all) deserves. My job is to get the pizzas there on time. I don't deserve to get extra money in tips if I get the pizza there on time. Plus, people are already paying a delivery fee too - they shouldn't have to pay the delivery fee and give me a tip when I'm only doing my job.

Actually, now that I have a tip-based job I think even more that tipping is stupid because I can see first hand how easy and stupid my job is and how greedy and selfish the other drivers are. They definitely don't deserve extra money. I am POOR and have a good education and am not just some greedy low life who wants the easiest job for the most money, and I still think tipping is dumb.

(Okay, so maybe all tippees are not greedy low lifes - maybe they're like me and are just between jobs or actually like doing that kind of work, or have some other reason they're doing a tip-based job that is not purely based on wanting a lot of money for doing easy work. But, these exceptions are not enough to justify the tipping system.)

So, I'm not going to be handing anyone back their tip, but if people give me no tip or a crappy tip, I don't blame them. I wouldn't tip me either. I know I don't deserve it for what I'm doing - the easiest, most pointless job ever. And, I don't get the people who give me $10 tips for one pizza - they must just be generous freaks or too drunk/high to realize what they've done.

Maybe I'd change my tune if I got to work the night shifts and made a million dollars a night, but for now, when I'm making only $8/day in tips (on a good day), I'm sticking to this.

I always threaten to stop tipping altogether, to single-handedly start this anti-tipping revolution. Then when the check comes, I become a coward and leave a tip. I'm putting my foot down now, unless I get exceptional service, I'm only leaving a modest tip not the full 15% or whatever ridiculous figure it's up to now. Just look at the jerks who are getting that tip money:

This driver at my work closes five nights a week. He makes as much in one night as I do in an entire week (including my wages and everything). I worked with him, and one other driver on Sunday night. He cried because there were three drivers. "There's never three drivers on Sunday night, I don't know why three drivers are scheduled." The greedy baby didn't want to have to share his deliveries with a third person - even though I'm only getting $2-$8/DAY in tips the four other days I work while he is becoming rich. Then, he threw a fit because I was going to take two deliveries instead of just one - even though the manager told me to take them because this jerk wasn't even there. The jerk walked in as I was about to leave, threw a fit, started telling me how it wasn't fair and blah blah blah. I had to give him the other delivery to stop his tantrum. Complete dick. God forbid I would get an extra $2.00 during my only night shift. Not to mention the fact that I was the only driver who washed dishes and helped make pizzas that night. I let him bully me because it was my first time working with him, and I didn't know he closed every night, so I thought "fine, it's only fair that we each take one delivery at a time, even though this forty year old loser is being a total greedy baby." Next time, he won't be so lucky.

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Now playing: Every Time I Die - I Been Gone A Long Time
via FoxyTunes

Delivery Girl Extraordinaire

2009-08-27T23:05:00.003-06:00

Well, as was to be expected, I hate my pizza delivery job. I wouldn't hate it so much if I didn't have the super-slow during the day shifts. I got to work for a few hours at night on Tuesday, and it was busy and went by fast and I got good tips. But.

Today I made two deliveries. Two. In seven hours. I only made $8 in tips. That, combined with my $8/hour, is not enough to support my extravagant living-below-the-poverty-line lifestyle. Plus, I figured out that if I had no other expenses whatsoever, the amount of money I will make in one month is not enough to pay one single payment of my student loans - which start in December. Which reminds me - I need to make an appointment to ask the financial aid people what's going to happen to me when I don't pay.

So, F this. I hate being poor. I've learned all I possibly can learn from experiencing true poor-dom, and I'm over it. And yet, I get more and more poor everyday. Example: I worked Tuesday, then spent all the money I made (and then some) on Wednesday, buying black shorts and shoes for my uniform.

I'm scheduled 5 days a week, so I only have one day to go in and work at Coastkeeper, which sucks. My brain is going to disintegrate into pizza sauce.

Someone needs to devise a system where people are just given money based on their character. Then, I'd be a thousandaire, at least. I'd for sure be a hundredaire.

On the bright side, so all you optimists out there can get yours too: I'm scheduled to work Sunday nights, which SUPPOSEDLY makes a ton of tips once football starts. The GM actually does work (including cleaning and other annoying work), unlike all other GMs (and assistant managers) who just sit around like idiots. The other people I've worked with aren't bad or lazy.

Everyone there keeps making jokes about how I went to law school. It was instantly old. Example: Don't say that, remember we've got a lawyer here! You went to law school, so this should be easy for you. Etc. Annoying. Don't remind me I went to law school and now I've been on the floor scrubbing the black grease off the baseboards for three hours. Just let me wallow.

Oh, what have I gotten myself into now!

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Now playing: Fireworks - Again and Again
via FoxyTunes

Fourteen Weeks

2009-08-13T14:53:00.002-06:00

I've got fourteen weeks until I get my bar results - Nov. 20. Until then, I need to stay afloat and do whatever I can to make sure I'll be able to get a law job once I'm admitted to the bar. Times are really tough around here, no doubt.

My scheme:

I got hired as a delivery driver for Round Table Pizza, $8/hr plus tips. They're only going to give me three days a week, during the day (worst time for tips), but I'm going to try to pick up as many extra shifts as possible and hopefully it will be enough to pay rent and buy food. Who knows when I'll actually start though, this is the most unorganized company in the universe - I have to call them everyday to remind them that they hired me and I have bills to pay. It's almost as bad as working for a movie theatre run by children, which I did as a youth.

I'm going to do pro bono (free) work for San Diego Coastkeeper as a full-time legal intern. That's where I interned from May-December of last year. This would be my dream job if they could somehow get enough money to hire another attorney. Since they're a non-profit, this is going to take a serious miracle. Operation: convince them they cannot live without hiring me, in full effect. I'm going to be working full-time hours, so I'll pretty much be working on this whenever I'm not delivering pizza to frat boys.

I'm writing some articles for the Green Scene section of a website for the company my dad is the editorial director for. (http://thegiggleguide.com/biz/features/green-scene) This pays (almost literally) peanuts, so it is mainly just a resume builder and maybe it could open doors for a real job. Plus, it's writing about stuff I'm interested in anyway so that's good. I'm working on an article right now actually, and it is pretty hard to figure out how to write this type of article for a specific audience instead of just writing whatever I want. Getting used to it.

I'm signed up to take a 5-unit Italian class at a community college two nights a week. Let's be honest - if you're not multi-lingual, what's the point of you? I might have to cancel the class if I can get some night shifts at Round Table, though. But, I like the fact that I can do credit/no credit and then I won't have to care about getting good grades (although my A-addiction will probably force me to care anyway), and if it turns out I have to quit halfway through the semester it won't be a big deal since I've already got my J.D. and this is just for fun anyway. I'm actually hoping a seat in a Japanese class that is full will open up, because I'm more interested in Japanese than Italian. Either way, if I have time I figure the best way to use it is to keep learning.

Bar Done

2009-07-31T11:44:00.002-06:00

Well, it's finally over.

I don't get my bar results until November 20. How did it go, you ask? How did I do?

It was crazily, crazily hard. Anyone who passes that messed up test deserves more than just a license to practice law. I know I screwed up on a couple of things, but I got a lot of stuff right, so it just depends on how they grade it and how they scale it I guess.

Let's just say, I wouldn't be completely shocked if I failed and had to do it again in February. But, god, if I have to take that thing again, I'll just die. It was definitely the hardest thing I've ever had to do, and the worst thing I've ever had to do. I can't believe how hard it was. I can't believe people who I would say are complete idiots somehow pass.

After each day, I felt like I had been at Magic Mountain all day, on a really hot day. All nauseous and headachy and tired and dead.

Now, I just have to pack my bags for Tahoe and figure out what the point of me is if I don't have something to study.

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Now playing: fun. - Take Your Time (Coming Home)
via FoxyTunes

Day One Done, Bitches

2009-07-28T20:58:00.002-06:00

Today was day one of the old bar. I think I passed everything. There wasn't anything I fully didn't know. I probably missed some stuff, but I feel like I definitely got enough to pass.

The main annoying thing is sitting for six hours. My lower back is killing. I'm going to have to bring a little pillow tomorrow. Like a true old lady.

Speaking of old ladies, the person who checked my I.D. at the exam did not wish me a happy birthday. Jerk. My old man got me the nicest flowers anyone has ever seen from his organic farm though. The seriously nicest. There is even an artichoke flower, and artichokes are my favorite vegetable, so it is like combining my favorite things into one. And, he made me the nicest chocolate cake. It says "great job" on it. I took a picture of both but I don't have the strength to upload them. I wish my camera was bluetooth. And, he took me out to Hodad's for dinner. And, he's taking me out for our real birthday dinner on Thursday night to Island Prime.

Tomorrow I've got six hours of multiple choice questions. 200 to be exact. But, multiple choice questions are my forte, so I'm not worried.

I'm dreading Thursday though, another essay day like today. The thought of doing today all over again is murderous.

Last Day

2009-07-26T17:44:00.003-06:00

I basically only have one day left until the big exam! I can't wait to get it over with.

I'm still studying, but I'm at the point where the more I study, the more I freak out about how much I still don't know. So, I'm trying not to over do it. You know how when you're studying for something and you're trying to take a break, but then your brain just decides to remind you that you don't know everything? I hate that. Like, I'll just be watching TV or something and I freak out because I suddenly think, "Great, I have no idea what the exceptions to the hearsay rule that require the declarant to be unavailable are!!" Then, I have to go look it up before I explode from anxiety. The other day I told Adam I couldn't watch TV because I realized I had no idea what an easement appurtenant was.

Tomorrow, I'm just going to quickly review a couple of things (and look up the things my brain forces me to freak out about), and that's it. No real studying on the final day. People keep asking me if I'm ready, so I will say I am about 82% sure I will pass. I really think the key is to not freak out and get all stressed and panicky during the exam - everyone else will be going fuzznuts, and I'll just be chill.

Something annoying: I wanted to double check that I did everything I needed to do to certify my laptop, but the CA bar website is down for some reason - I suspect a bunch of idiots are trying to get on it because of this article. So, that is really annoying to have the bar site down the day-ish before the test.

For my last meal (Monday night), I chose one of my favorites: spaghetti with vegan meatballs. Gotta carb up!

The only question that remains is whether whoever checks me in for the exam will wish me a happy birthday when they check my I.D. Please cast your vote via comment. I will keep you updated.

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Now playing: Architects - Left With A Last Minute
via FoxyTunes

The Interview

2009-07-24T16:20:00.002-06:00

I went with a black button-up shirt and jeans. I forgot about that combination. I was going to wear a dress, but it was just too too weird. And depressing. It was the dress I'm going to wear for my birthday. I can't wear my birthday dress to a Round Table interview.

First, I was interviewed by a mere child (had to be no older than 18) wearing glitter make up. I repeat: glitter make up. After everything I said, she either said it was "pretty cool" or "tight." That interview lasted about five minutes. Max.

Then, I was interviewed by an eager-to-please (also young, but not as young) nerd with bad teeth. Distractingly bad. He asked me the same questions the mere child asked. That interview lasted about five minutes. Max.

They led me to believe I was basically hired as long as I give them a copy of my driving record from the DMV. So, I went to the DMV, mentally preparing myself for the nightmare that is going to the DMV. There were two security guards outside who yelled to me, as soon as I opened my car door, "DMV's closed!" Me: "Why?" Them: "Budget problems. Gov'ner's orders." Me: "When will it open again?" Them: "Next week. Monday through Thursday."

Then, I called Round Table and told them I won't be able to get the driving record for two weeks. They know I'm taking the bar next week, and will be out of town the week after that. They said they'll try to fill the job until I get it to them, so I should get it as soon as possible.

So, now I have to go to the DMV on Monday. Yes, the day before the bar. Yes, my last day to study/relax. I'll have to wait for a million years to get the stupid driving record. The last time I had to go there, I had to wait three hours.

All this for a stupid $8/hour job, three days a week, during the day, when there are shitty tips.

Emergency Fashion Question!

2009-07-23T20:27:00.002-06:00

I have a job interview at Round Table Pizza tomorrow. What does one wear to an interview for an $8/hour job? My choices are:

Normal clothes (cut off jeans and t-shirt)
Dress (w/ sandals or heels)
Business suit

I have nothing that is the equivalent of a guy wearing a polo and jeans. Adam says to wear a dress, but that seems weird too. I guess they all would be weird, which is the least weird? Help!

Brain Storm Assignment

2009-07-21T13:35:00.006-06:00

I need help thinking of jobs I should apply for while I wait for my bar results. I want something that won't make me want to kill myself. Something full-time. Something more than minimum wage, if possible. If it's minimum wage, something where I'll likely be able to pick up extra shifts to get overtime because just full-time minimum wage will not be enough for rent and loan payments and food. Someplace that is actually hiring. Somewhere in San Diego.

I've already tried: Trader Joe's, Henry's (market), WaMu. None are hiring.

I am also available to house sit, dog sit, and even human sit - no reasonable offer refused!

Begin your brain storm now! Thanks buddies.

Oh, and my qualifications are: I can quickly learn how to do pretty much everything, I have a B.A. in Political Science (completely useless), and a J.D. So, I can't do anything that requires any other specific degrees.

My New BFF

2009-07-20T14:31:00.003-06:00

This weekend, my mom gave us her pressure cooker she never uses. It is the greatest thing in the universe! I don't know why people aren't constantly walking around talking about how great pressure cookers are. Over my lifetime, it will save me DAYS of time that I would be wasting sitting around waiting for beans to cook. Maybe weeks even. (I am determined to live to be at least 100.)

Today I turned dry beans into soft beans for my world famous chili in just 12 minutes! 12 minutes, people! That would normally take me 4 HOURS. I'm only just now thinking about the energy savings here too - now I only have to waste enough energy to have a pot on simmer for 12 minutes, rather than 4 hours. Miraculous.

You can cook basically anything in one of these beauties. Beans, legumes, grains, vegetables, meat, fish. It is insanity. Although, I don't think I'd use mine to cook vegetables, except root vegetables, because veggies only take a few minutes to steam or saute anyway, and I would be scared of over-cooking them.

This is the site I used to figure out how long to cook the beans for: http://missvickie.com. It looks all messed up, but that should be forgiven because it has all the info you will ever need to cook under pressure. (I didn't make that up.) It has cook times and recipes for everything, plus basic info - which was essential for me because I don't have the instructions and I was very worried that I was going to blow something up.

Get one now!

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Now playing: The Hippos - Rock n Roll
via FoxyTunes

Five Pounds of Fun

2009-07-16T10:22:00.003-06:00

We bought this 5 lb tub of Kool-Aid last night for about $5. Summer summer summer summer.

Simulated Essay Day

2009-07-13T21:30:00.003-06:00

Today was my simulated essay day. We started the day with three essays in three hours. It wasn't that bad. I missed a few issues, but I don't think I did anything majorly wrong. But, I always finish to early - like an hour early. I don't know how worried I should be about that because I always have finished tests before everyone else, and I'm a fast typist so I can just type faster than most people. But, they say if you finish early then you must be doing something wrong. I don't know how to force myself to be slower. I figure I either know the answer, or I don't. So, if I know it I just type it and that's that. If I don't, I don't. I only know how to take tests the way I always have, so I'm not going to try and force myself to be slower just for the sake of being slower. After all, if all goes according to plan, this will be the last test I ever take in my entire life.

Then, after an hour lunch break, we had three hours to do a performance test. A performance test is basically a pretend assignment from a senior attorney. The fact pattern will be the senior attorney giving you some assignment about a case, and then there will be a "library" of cases you are supposed to use as authority to complete the assignment.

Examples: Opening and closing statements, memorandum of points and authorities, memorandum on whether you think you can win the case, affidavits, interrogatories, etc. Usually you have two or three of those things to write. You don't have to use any outside knowledge to complete the assignment - everything you need to know is in the library. The main thing you are being tested on is whether you understand what type of writing you are supposed to be doing (persuasive or objective), whether you understand what kind of tone to use (something a jury is supposed to be able to understand, or something a judge should understand), and whether you actually know how the document you are creating is formatted.

I don't think the performance test is that hard. You don't even truly have to know the formatting because the assignment will say something like "this is how memorandum of points and authorities are written in this firm:" and then they'll tell you how to organize it. The two performance tests are worth 40% of the written portion grade, so if you can do really well on the performance test, you can make up for doing poorly on the essays.

So, overall the day wasn't too bad. I didn't get that starving, and there wasn't anything I got totally stuck and freaked out with. It's mainly just boring. Only two weeks left to pound the rest of this info into my brain!

Oh - and the fire alarm went off three times, and it was really really really loud. Like, it hurt my ears it was so loud. We suspected maybe they did that to us on purpose to teach us to deal with crazy stuff happening during the test (because last summer there was a significant earthquake during the test and some people freaked), but then we found out it was accidental. Still annoying though. Plus, rumor has it that more people than usual passed last summer because they went easy on the grading due to the earthquake debacle. If that's true (which I doubt it is - no bar exam rumor is ever true), then I hope there is an earthquake or a fire alarm or something to give me some bonus points. My nerves cannot be rattled.

Push

2009-07-09T14:00:00.003-06:00

I've got some long days of studying ahead. I have another practice MBE (mulitple choice day) on Friday, then on Monday we're doing a practice essay day (3 essays in 3 hours, lunch break, 3 hour performance test). After that, I'm on my own - no more classes, I just have to motivate myself to study for the final two weeks.

So, when I'm sitting at my computer working away, and I want to die from boredom/frustration, I look at the picture we have above the monitor and push on.

Group photo before heading out for our camping trip last summer.
J-fer, me, Adam, Bear Bear, Julie.

Everything about that picture is funny. The way everyone is standing, and the looks on everyone's faces, sums up everything about us. So, I die laughing, and remember how it's going to feel to be free once this studying business is over.

A couple days after the exam, we're leaving for our annual Lake Tahoe camping trip. I can't wait. It is pure motivation. That, and we're eating at my favorite restaurant (Island Prime) on the last day of the exam. I hope they give me some free cake.

Vacations are the greatest inventions ever. What's your favorite summer vacay?

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Now playing: The Starting Line - Way With Words
via FoxyTunes

Acceptance

2009-07-08T10:43:00.002-06:00

Well, I have officially reached the final phase of the typical Bar exam freak-out: Acceptance.

My stress rash is gone, and I'm not having nightmares anymore. The kink in my neck is gone. I'm not having crazy hot flashes anymore. Generally, I've been sleeping pretty well. I'm still tired all the time, but not completely exhausted all the time.

I've accepted that it is impossible for me to have every single part of all 16 subjects memorized - even if I had my whole life to study. So, there are going to be some things on the test that I just don't know the answer to. And, I'll just make something up and move on.

After all, this thing is only supposed to make sure you have the "minimum competence" to practice law in CA. From the lawyers I've heard about, and from the appellate briefs I've read working for the California Innocence Project, it seems like that "bar" is very low.

There is just one thing I can't come to terms with - the CA Bar is letting in fewer members than ever before. How? By grading harder, and having harder questions. So, even though I know a ton about the law, I don't know the super tricky things or the things that pretty much no one actually understands. And, during the lectures the professors say "this has never been tested on the Bar, EVER, so you don't need to study it." But, to me that just means that they WILL test that now so they can keep more people out! So, hopefully the examiners won't be as hard and tricky as they can be.

No one knows why the Bar is letting fewer people in. I have a theory though: to discourage people from going to law school just to get rich, or just because they don't want to get a real job yet and their parents are going to foot the bill. Those jerks just clog up the job market for people who are actually trying to fulfill their dreams around here!

Also: one of the lecturing professors said that we should take 5 minutes each day from now until the exam to visualize ourselves taking the exam and then passing because (supposedly) that is what athletes do and studies have been done showing that visualization actually works. Or something. I tried doing that, but I spent almost the entire time visualizing what I'm going to have for breakfast. An everything bagel with cream cheese and avocado. Then, I started wondering if Sushi Deli will be open, and if it is even close to where the test is, and if I'll have time to go there during my hour lunch break on exam day. So, basically I wasted the whole 5 minutes thinking about food. But, I can now guarantee I will be eating well for those three days.

The Fourth

2009-07-02T12:32:00.002-06:00

Plans for The Fourth?

I'm going to watch a video of the lecture I'm supposed to go on Friday online, and skip class on Friday. Then, I'm going to give myself the weekend off. Well, basically off. I'm going to read over my notes at the beach. My tutor told me to take some days off and just watch the videos instead of going in to class, and to take 4th of July weekend off. So, I'm going to take her advice and recharge for my final three weeks.

One of my bros and his old lady are coming down to party. Partying to them = playing badminton at some badminton club down here.

This will be the first time my old man and I have stayed in San Diego for 4th of July. (Our first year living here we were in Europe, last year we went to my bro's house in L.A.) Apparently, there is a fireworks display at the pier a few blocks from our apartment that is simply riveting.

I'm going to try my hand at making some homemade vegan sausages and another batch of vegan burgers, because I think that is traditionally what one eats on the 4th of July. Minus the vegan part.

And, on Sunday we're probably going to go watch the Dodgers moitelize the Padres.

God bless America.

2d Toots Sesh

2009-06-26T10:03:00.003-06:00

I had my second free ($500 value) tutoring session last night. When I walked in, my tutor asked me what I was doing there and said I don't need tutoring, I already know it all. I told her I had to get my money's worth.

Plus, I feel like I do need it. I had some questions and I don't know anyone else who has taken the bar, so I have no one else to ask. And, I found out that I get $250 back when I return my study books in November (after we find out if we passed or failed). Hopefully, by November $250 won't be the equivalent of a million dollars to me. But, for now it is good to look forward to that windfall.

So, remember when I said that I did really bad on the practice MBE (multiple choice test)? When I told my tutor that I did really bad, and then told her my score, she scoffed at me. Apparently, I actually did good, especially since I still have four weeks to study. So, I can stop worrying about that now. I'm surprised at how bad one can do, and still pass.

Now, we're working on community property law, which is basically just who gets what upon divorce. In CA, it is really complicated. Lots of squabbling and all kinds of interesting ways to try to screw each other.

Only four-ish more weeks, baby!

Burg Down

2009-06-20T12:58:00.004-06:00

Here's my first ever invented vegan (until you load it up with cheese) burger recipe. I can't believe they (a) came out edible and (b) were really delicious. I forgot to take a picture. Just picture the dankest burger ever. Let me know if you burg down on these. I don't think anyone but my Bear Bear ever tries my recipes.

Ingredients:

3 cups black beans (I actually used a mix of black beans and chickpeas)
1 scant cup roasted cashews, ground to a powder in a food pro
3/4 cup instant rolled oats
1/4 cup vital wheat gluten (not totally necessary if you don't have it - use more oats, or supplement with bread crumbs, or a dash or two of flour to get a non-crumbly, non-dry consistency)
1 T. olive oil
1 T. soy sauce
1 carrot, grated
1 head of roasted garlic
2 roasted serrano peppers, or jalepenos, chopped (omit if you hate spicy)
5-ish tablespoons of some kind of sauce, I used:
2 T. ketchup
1 T. dijon mustard
1 T. BBQ sauce
1 T. A1
1 teas. hickory liquid smoke (good quality)

Method:

Squash the beans. They should be mostly all squashed, but leave some whole-ish ones too.
Put everything in with your beans and mix.
Taste the mix. Make sure it isn't yucky. Add salt, pepper, and more sauces until it is good.
Form into burgers. This made six burgers for me.
Put on a non-stick baking sheet, or do something to make sure your burgers aren't going to stick. Just lay a piece of foil over the top.
Bake at 350 for about 20 minutes. Check them after 10, to make sure nothing crazy is going on. Watch the bottoms, my oven is a piece of crap and the bottoms got a little burned-looking, but they didn't taste burned at all. If the tops look like they're not getting dark enough for your liking, take the foil off but keep them in your mind so they don't get scorched.
You'll know they're done when they are fairly solid, not pure mush. If you think they're too soft, but are worried about cooking them too long, finish them off in a pan with some oil. Or, do that if you like them extra crispy on the outside, but you don't want them to be all dry and gross.
You could probably cook them in a frying pan, or on the BBQ too, but I haven't tried it.
These freeze well. Just take out of the freezer, and pop them in the oven at 350 for fifteen minutes or so. I don't know how long they'll last, ours were all gone within a week.

El Diablo De Michoacan Variation:
Top the cooked burger with some blue cheese crumbles, two roasted serrano peppers or jalepenos (chopped), and a slice of cheddar cheese. In that order. Put it back in the oven until it gets all melty. This is way too spicy for my taste, but my old man loved it.

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Now playing: The Format - Inches and Falling
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Satisfying the Elements

2009-06-19T17:27:00.004-06:00

So, nothing's really changed around here stress-wise. Still manifesting physical symptoms of stress. Now, a weird chicken pox-like rash. I barely get any sleep, and my sleep is purely restless. I have bad dreams about law stuff. Like, every character in my dreams has to satisfy the elements of (some thing) before they can do whatever it is I want them to do, and it is purely frustrating because they NEVER satisfy the elements, so I wake up exhausted from trying to get these idiots to satisfy the elements of whatever it is. Sometimes, I'm like 90% asleep and I start thinking I need to satisfy the elements in order to fall asleep, but I can't satisfy the elements. "Satisfying the elements" is from studying - the prosecution has to prove the defendant's conduct satisfied the elements of whatever the crime is. Annoying.

No jobs in sight. Eighty-ish bucks left in the bank.

I don't know what I would do without my old man, he's the only thing that keeps me hanging on to my last shred of sanity. I would probably just give up, stop fighting the impending psychosis, and become a scary bum.

Yesterday we did a practice MBE in class. The MBE is the multiple choice part of the bar exam. Everyone in every state does the same MBE - 200 questions, 6 hours, 1 hour break after 3.

I finished both halves of the practice MBE with an extra half an hour, so time will not be an issue. And, I actually wasn't feeling as brain-fried as I had expected, so that was a relief. But, I did pretty bad - I definitely would have failed if this was real life. The annoying thing is I actually thought I did all right. But, I still have five weeks to study, so I should be fine. They're going to give us back our results with info on how all the other Bar/Bri students in the country did on the practice exam (to see how we compare to everyone else), and what our best/worst subjects are. Hopefully, a lot of people did worse than I did. I did really bad though.

Also, I know I told a bunch of people that I might not actually be graduating Cum Laude, even though that's what got announced at my graduation. Well, I got my final grades and a letter saying that I did get Cum Laude. So, yay me. Statistically, it's unlikely I'll fail the bar. So, I figure I have it, all I can do is screw it up now.

Back to studying. Corporations! Another boring subject I don't care about!

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Now playing: October Fall - Keep It Comin'
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It's That Time Of Year Again!

2009-06-09T13:48:00.002-06:00

Yes, it is that time of year again! The time when I remind you to eat your seafood sustainably! This is an issue near and dear to my heart, I think because a lot of people just don't know how bad the seafood industry is for the environment. The oceans are basically the core of our lives, and once the oceans collapse, we won't stand a chance.

Fish populations just can't keep up with our consumption demands. And, fisherpeople can't keep up with our demands either - so they find cheaper, faster, and more environmentally-damaging ways to get more seafood.

Please take three minutes out of your day to watch this entertaining video about sustainable seafood - you can then consider yourself forgiven for using that plastic water bottle today. Yes, I know about all your environmental sins.

Then, the next time you buy seafood make sure it is (i) local and (ii) sustainable. If you can't (or simply refuse to) watch the video, I will reveal to you how you can find out if the seafood you are about to buy is eco-wise:

You can text: fish (species name) to 30644, and some genius will text you back with info on whether you should pull the trigger on getting that fish or not. Example: fish diver scallops.

There is also a Seafood Watch iPhone app (of course!) that will help you out.

If you're more low-tech, you can print out this seafood guide, fold it up on the lines, and take it with you wherever you go.

More links, info, and the original source of the video found here.

Still Alive, Don't Know How.

2009-06-06T13:39:00.003-06:00

Yep, I'm still alive. No posts because sometimes the thought of posting is torturous.

I had a personal tutoring session with a Bar/Bri tutor. Normal price is $500/hour, but my school pays for us to have two sessions during the Bar/Bri program. I can't imagine paying $500 for that. The lady said some people are signed up for tutoring packages that cost $10,000. I almost fainted and barfed. Note: If anyone wants to throw that much money at someone, please just throw it at me!

The tutor was impressed I was actually staying on schedule. I can't imagine not staying on schedule though, so much money and time will be wasted if I fail the exam. Apparently, hardly anyone actually sticks to the schedule. Basically she thought I was doing really well and that I am for sure going to pass. So, that was good news.

Then, I started manifesting physical symptoms of stress/anxiety. Specifically, at random times my shoulders, upper back, elbows, and the skin on top of my hands would start aching like crazy. Aching like growing pains, or like when you have the flu and you're all achy - except worse. Not like sore muscles, but aches. It happened during class and the pain was almost too much to bear; I had to come home early instead of staying and studying. It happened again that night while I was watching TV. Plus, I have a headache and stomachache most days.

I think I actually am getting multiple sclerosis, but I don't know what the symptoms of that actually are. It seems like random severe aches would be a symptom. But, since I realize that is probably not what it is, I decided to put it in the manifesting physical symptoms of stress category. If anyone knows of a disease I could have, please let me know so when I have insurance some day I can get cured.

But, the Bar is the least of my worries. I am purely stressed from the stupid job market. Career services sent out this email basically saying there are no jobs, so we have to schedule an appt to talk to someone there to figure out what we're supposed to do now. Awesome. The thought of going through three years of all this and then not being able to do what I wanted to do is crippling. And, trying not to think about that is exhausting.

I'm exhausted.

We're off to my parents' house this weekend for a change of scenery.

Newsflash: Lays Are Not "Local"

2009-05-29T12:30:00.002-06:00

First things first: I love Lays potato chips. Although I never buy them, (oh wait, actually I do buy the Olestra ones and the baked ones) I will eat them if they are at any party/gathering. Additionally, I don't look down on anyone who loves Lays, or buys Lays. So, this is not an elitist post, it is just an FYI. I spent an hour writing/researching this, so please actually read it - I know it's long.

Last night, I saw a commercial for Lays that had a bunch of different farmers from different parts of the country saying they supply the potatoes for Lays. Then, at the end some text said something about thanking the farmers all over the United States for supplying such good potatoes. Or something. You can probably look it up on YouTube if you really want to see it, since I am probably the only one who still actually watches live TV and commercials.

I didn't really think anything of it. Maybe I wasn't paying attention enough. I just thought, "who cares where the farmers are from, I assumed they got the potatoes from a bunch of different farms, not one single crazily gigantic farm." But, the common man is supposed to interpret this commercial as meaning Lays are a locally grown food. Puh-lease.

This morning, coincidentally, I read a bunch of articles on my Google reader about how Lays has started this marketing campaign to convince people that Lays potato chips are a LOCAL food - thus implying they are an environmentally friendly brand, and all us greenies should flock to the store to grab some of these local chips. This is going to be their biggest ad campaign in 2009. You can even enter the code on your bag of chips on the Lays website to find out, specifically, which state/states the potatoes in that bag came from.

However, Lays are not local, and are not an environmentally friendly brand (although, as far as I know they aren't any worse than most other companies, which are all un-environmetnal but pay marketers big bucks to trick us into thinking they are). The vast vast vast majority of Lays potatoes are grown on industrial farms, which are - by nature - not environmentally friendly.

They are not local in the way any enviro would define the term. Local means it was grown and produced close to where you are consuming it; and it usually also carries a hint of fair labor practices, humane treatement of animals, and environmentally friendly processes with it. Local also implies a small or medium sized farm - definitely not an industrial farm, for sure. I think the agreed upon distance between growing site and consumption site is 100 miles, but I haven't been invited to any enviro meetings where we discuss the exact logistics of all this, so that number probably has some wiggle room depending on how close to the line between nutbar and enviro you want to be.

A survey of restaurant chefs by the National Restaurant Association (NRA? odd...) found that "locally grown" foods is the top trend for 2009.

Also, Lays isn't the only company throwing "local" into the mix in a misleading way. I looked it up and lots of other big companies are doing close to the same thing. It just the new marketing ploy to trick people into handing over more money for something they think is "green," but actually isn't. Because there is no hard and fast rule who can say what is "local," companies can get away with it.

Lays' justification is they think people are interested in knowing where the food was grown, and it creates a sense of community to know the potatoes came from their state. They also want people to know Lays is an American company with American workers, and so when you buy a bag of Lays chips you are helping Americans through tough times.

Fine.

But, their ad campaigns are inarguably misleading to the common man who has probably heard that it is a good thing to "buy local." That it is an environmentally friendly thing to buy local. The common man doesn't know that "local" doesn't just mean the food was grown nearby, that it involves way more than that, as I said earlier. The common man doesn't know that if you buy food that was grown nearby, but at an industrial farm, it is a million times (not an exact figure) worse than buy food that was grown farther away at a small or medium sized farm. The common man is just trying to be a good green member of society and do what they've heard is the right thing to do. They're not going to Google what local actually is, and they're not going to be subscribed to these green blogs that are all in an uproar over this new ad trend. So, Lays knows exactly how its local ad campaigns will be interpreted, regardless of what they claim their motive is.

So, the bottom line is if you see a major brand advertising that it is local - don't believe it is really local in the enviro meaning of the word. If you really want to buy local food, go to your local farmer's market, or your neighborhood hippie-ish type grocery store, and ask them where the food comes from. Any self-respecting hippie will be able to help you with that. If you go to a restaurant that claims to have local food, ask which farms it comes from. This serves the duel purpose of making sure it actually is local, and showing the restaurant/store that customers care about having food that is actually local. Two birds.

Mycological Mania

2009-05-28T22:09:00.004-06:00

Did you know we're growing some fungi in our tiny apartment? No? Neither does Dorris. The apartment manager.

These are our pet oyster mushrooms. They grow in that plastic bag full of straw you see in that first picture there, and come out through holes my old man poked in the bag. It's not just straw in the bag though. There are spawns. And other things I can't remember. My old man knows all about it, he will have to leave a comment and explain it to you.

Man, this is turning into a boring, pointless blog with little to no useful information in it. I pretty much just wanted to boast that we have a shroomery in our apartment, and I wanted to show off that awesome picture my old man took. So, please, ooh and ahh and tell all your friends you "know" people who run a shroomery.

I like them because they look cool, like a little miniature fungi city. And, they grow super fast and that is interesting. Plus, they don't taste half bad either.

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Now playing: Matchbox Twenty - Bright Lights
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Summer Is In The Air

2009-05-24T20:41:00.002-06:00

A couple days ago, Adam was looking at the SD Reader and saw there was going to be a beer festival or something on May 17. This conversation followed:

Me: We already missed it.
A: Huh?
Me: It already happened. Today is May 22.
A: May 22? I thought this was March.

Only one day out of school and he already is in summer mode - not knowing what day it is. Or month.

Another sign of summer: The white line across my nose is clearly noticeable.

My Body Weary

2009-05-23T12:58:00.003-06:00

Noon on Saturday, and I'm at school studying. Well, about to start studying. On deck today: Review evidence (I never know what they mean by "review," so I usually just read through my notes), do an evidence multiple choice practice test, do an evidence practice essay exam, read the mini review for remedies (25 pages - not bad, most "mini" reviews are more like 70 pages).

I rode my bike to/fro school four days last week. And, I played indoor soccer on Thursday night. And, we had but one sub, so I played the entire game with no subs. For indoor soccer, that is crazy. And, some idiot kicked me in the ankle at full force. With so much force that she was limping around trying to say her toes were broken. I didn't say peep, because I'm not a little baby, even though I was in pure pain. And, I'm not feeling fit or strong, I'm just feeling exhausted. I could seriously fall asleep at any moment. That's rare for me because it normally takes me about an hour to fall asleep.

The study schedule I'm on gave us the day off for Sunday and Monday, so I will have two guilt-free days of rest at least.

Tahoe is going to be the sweetest Tahoe I've ever had.

**Update: I am actually supposed to review torts, not remedies. Torts is 50 pages. Grumble grumble.

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Now playing: Forgive Durden - The Missing Piece (ft. Lizzie Huffman)
via FoxyTunes

Spilt Pea Barley Soup

2009-05-22T15:30:00.000-06:00

A couple of weeks ago, I had split pea barley soup at Soup Plantation, and it was so good I decided to cook myself up a batch. Of course, mine is way way better.

This takes about 1.5 hours, mostly inactive. Makes enough for at least six starving people.

Ingredients:

6 cups vegetable broth
1 + 1/2 cups DRY green split peas
1/2 large onion, or 1 small onion, haphazardly chopped
1 potato, haphazardly chopped
2 carrots, haphazardly chopped
2 cloves garlic, haphazardly chopped
1/2 cups pearl barley

Method:

Put ingredients 1-6 in a three quart pot (or a cast iron dutch oven, if you're awesome) and bring to a boil.
Reduce heat to a simmer, cover, and let it do its thing for an hour.
Using your boat motor (immersion blender), blend the soup until it is silky smooth. If you don't have a boat motor, buy one - or - LET IT COOL and then blend it in a blender or food processor in small batches.
Return the soup to the pot (if you used a blender), add the barley, and simmer for 30-40 minutes, until the barley is nice and tender. Be careful here - the soup will be nice and creamy, and will want to burn to the bottom of the pan. Keep your heat low, and stir occasionally.
Give it a taste, and add salt and pepper as you see fit. Serve with some fresh baked french bread and feel good for making something so tasty and healthy.
The leftovers get super thick - just add some water when you re-heat and you'll be back in business.

Split peas and barley are super healthy. They have a ton of fiber and protein (and a bunch of other super healthy stuff), so you will be getting a lot of bang for your buck here. Your taste buds, tummy, heart, and intestines will thank you! This soup is also good for diabetics, as the high amounts of soluable fiber helps to stabilize blood sugar levels, whilst providing steady, slow-burning energy. Post-menopausal? Barley works wonders for your cardiovascular health! Best of all this soup TASTES GOOD, and people who hate the idea of eating something healthy will never know what they've gotten themselves into - they'll think they are having some fancy shmancy soup akin to what one might find in a gourmet restaurant. (Little do they know this soup costs about...a few pennnies (if you buy in bulk) per serving! Ha!) Plus, no animals even had to die to make this yummy soup.

This soup kills tons of birds with one stone! Make it, I don't see how anyone could not love it.

Please, no obvious jokes about The Exorcist or Linda Blair. I just don't have the patience for such shenanigans.

Back on Track

2009-05-19T19:41:00.002-06:00

Yesterday was supposed to be day one of my fresh start. It got messed up though, because my bike was broken, and after spending 45 minutes trying to fix it, I just had to drive to school. But, I still stayed after class and studied for a long time.

Last night, my old man fixed my bike, so I rode to school today. It's 7 miles each way. It actually wasn't hard at all. Plus, I can take this bike path for probably 1/2 or 1/3 of the way, right along the bay, so I don't have to deal with jerk cars that whole time and can just contemplate the beauty of the water. Dealing with jerk cars is the main thing I hate about riding bikes. My bike is still kind of broken though (it broke after school, but I fixed it for now), so I'll have to get it fixed someone soon-ish. Hopefully that won't cost a million dollars.

And, now that I am officially a bike commuter, I can look down on those who could ride their bikes to school/work, but don't, with a clear conscience.

And, I'm slowly but surely catching up on all the studying I didn't do last week. And, I found out that I am actually kind of good at Evidence, when I thought I sucked. Which is lucky because Evidence is the second-hardest subject, after Property. So, maybe I'll have a bit of an advantage there.

So, everything is good for now. I was worried I would hate riding my bike, and would have to force myself to ride each day. But, I really don't see any reason why I wouldn't ride every day. It was surprisingly not bad.

I am going to be so fit.

The Mass Exodus

2009-05-17T14:25:00.002-06:00

While we were house-sitting, I drove down a bunch of streets I don't normally go down. And, I realized there are tons and tons of houses for sale and rent in our little O.B. Tons. There is some kind of mass exodus inland going on, probably because it is way cheaper to be an inlander. This is the opposite of how it normally is though - normally people flock to live near the beach come summer.

So, I seriously need to get someone to hire me. If I had a job, we could afford to rent a tiny little house with a yard and dog privileges. Our dream come true. Minus the part about the dog, which is just my dream come true. I need to get a job before the mass exodus is over and they all flock back!

I miss the dogs we sat so much. Especially the yellow one. No, the brown one. I can't pick, I love them both so so much. No, I pick the yellow one because the brown one accidentally stepped on my toe and cut it and it still hurts. I finally was getting to be a good dog trainer (the Gentle Leader IS God) and then we had to leave. If I didn't have all this studying going on, I'd offer to take them to the beach everyday still, but I just can't fit that into my sched now.

Fresh Start or Official Notice

2009-05-16T15:21:00.002-06:00

I was pretty lazy with my studies this past week. In class, we were doing practice essay exams and practice multiple choice exams. For our at-home assignments, we were supposed to "review" the subjects we've done so far (just real property and crimes) and then do practice exams at home. I did the "review" part, and the practice multiple choice questions, but I didn't do the practice essays. The thought of sitting down and doing two hour-long essay exams is just too much to bear. And, since the thought is too much to bear, the actual doing would be pure torture.

I'm an idiot for doing this though. One of the major reasons why I destroyed my final exams during my first semester of law school is because I did every practice exam there was before the real exams. And, I killed it. So, I know for a fact that doing practice essay exams is a really really good thing to do. And yet, I cannot bring myself to do it. Ugh, I hate it so much. At least I did the in-class practice essays though, a bunch of people didn't even show up for that.

So, this week, I'm going to start fresh and get back to doing all the stuff they have scheduled for me to study everyday. And, I'm going to study at least 5.5 hours everyday (not including breaks), even though it has been taking me only about 4 hours to finish the schedule. We're supposed to find something else to study until we get to at least 5.5 hours. Since I didn't do the at home essay exams this past week, if I finish my study schedule early, I'll go back and do those stupid practice exams. Promise.

Also, I'm going to start riding my bike to school everyday. I had planned to do that all along, but then we did this house sitting thing which would've added two more miles to my ride, so I put it off until now (we're back home now). It's about 6.5 miles each way. I will be killing many, many birds with but one stone though:

I will be forced to exercise, thus relieving stress.
I'll get my Tahoe Body. We're doing our annual Tahoe camping trip right when I get finished with the bar exam, and I have to look good and be able to do everything without huffing and puffing . Most people gain a lot of weight while studying for the bar, and I'm not one to become a statistic.
I'll save gas money. Since I only have enough money to last me until Oct. 1, and I failed to include gas money in those calculations, this is crucial.
I'll save emissions.
People will see me riding my awesome bike and think I am the coolest person ever, which might inspire them to give me a job (my old man pimped my ride for my graduation present, so it is even cooler than it used to be - way more elitist).
My old man will be proud of me. He rides his bike everyday, everywhere.

And, the last new thing I am adding to my routine this week is I am going to stay at school and study until I'm done, instead of coming home after class and getting all distracted. I was also planning on doing that from the start, but I had to come home to take the dogs we were sitting to the beach, so that plan got ruined. My old man is finished with this semester at his school next week, so he'll be able to cook and clean everything, so I won't have to deal with that. I haven't told him this part of the plan yet. This is his official notice.

We'll see how long this lasts.

Dinner View

2009-05-13T09:42:00.004-06:00

This is our dinner view from the front porch. Pretty much every house around here has a front porch with tables and chairs and a view like this. Yet, every night without fail we are the only ones eating dinner outside. Mark my words, if I am ever lucky enough to have a house with a view like this, I'll never stop appreciating it.

Getting My Money's Worth or Our First Casualty

2009-05-10T12:07:00.002-06:00

I just had an epiphony. I only drink to get my money's worth. I drink in Vegas, because you get free drinks while you're losing money, so I have to get a lot of drinks in order to get my money's worth. I drink at all events that serve free alcohol, because I know alcohol is expensive and so I have to get my money's worth. I drink when someone (a friend, not some weird man) offers to buy me a drink for the same reason. I'm bad about that though - I rarely (if ever) "get the next round," which is how that relationship is supposed to work. I very very rarely drink if it isn't one of the above enumerated situations. So, I only drink to get my money's worth.

I had this epiphony while riffling through the liquor cabinet at the house we're sitting - which we have free reign of, and were even told "drink all of our liquor, have a party." Unfortunately, for some reason we were unable to convince a single person to come over and hang out with us at this awesome beach house. I seriously don't get people. Their priorities are all out of whack.

Anyway, I was going through the liquor cabinet because I decided we haven't been drinking enough of this free liquor, so we aren't getting our money's worth. So, I put some bottles on the table so we'll remember to drink up. After all, I don't know if we're getting paid for this house/dog sitting, so this liquor may be all the compensation we get!

In other news, one fish has died. In our defense, something was already wrong with it. It was a goldfish, but sometime recently it turned white. So, it was sick or something. Therefore, this casualty was not our fault. All the animals that anyone actually really cares about are still living.

I Can't Remember How To Spell This Title or Day Four

2009-05-07T20:09:00.005-06:00

I'm almost finished with Day 4/a million for Bar/Bri, and I can say it sucks badly. Worse than law school. It's like as bad as first semester, except worse because we have the Bar to worry about, not just stupid finals. I study for about an hour before class, then go to class for 3-4 hours in the morning. Then, I take like an hour long break to eat and drink Coke Zero. Then, I take the dogs to the beach for at least 30 minutes. Then, I study for about 5-6 hours. Then, I eat dinner and watch Six Feet Under DVDs with my old man. It suuuuucks.

I'm done with Property and am now study Crimes. Property is the hardest subject (it is seriously crazily hard), so I'm glad they taught us that first, while we are still fresh. On the first day, they gave us this calendar that has everything we are supposed to do/study each day. Thank god, I didn't have to waste time figuring that out. The schedule goes something like this: Go to morning lecture; read (whatever subject) mini-review (by mini, they mean at least 40 pages!); review lecture notes; do practice multiple choice questions for (whatever subject), and review (18 questions, each about 150 words, takes about half an hour or so, then the reviewing the answers takes close to an hour). Some days there is another thing added on. So far, I've done everything for every day.

Also - the schedule includes weekends. Even though I don't have lecture class, I still have to watch a lecture online, then do all that other crap. So...from now until my birthday (of all days!), when the testing begins, every single mingle day, I have to do a TON of studying. It is so hard. At least in regular school, after the first semester, I was able to have a tiny bit of time to relax on weekends.

I figure as long as I stay on track, I'll be fine. Afterall, Bar/Bri is able to charge a legal bitch ton of money ($4500) for this class because their system works, and people who do Bar/Bri generally pass.

It's only been four days, and I am displaying all the symptoms of exhaustion/fried brains. Such as: not being able to remember how to spell simple words (it took me like three minutes to remember how to spell "allow" earlier), missing exits on the freeway, headache, stomachache, ready to sleep at any moment, and I am steadily losing the ability to concentrate - making those five hour studying stints rough.

I have serious respect for anyone who has done Bar/Bri and passed the Bar in CA. It is weird though, because it is like we (once I pass) are all in this club of people who had something really fucked up happen to them, that no one else can understand because there is no way to understand how it is unless you're doing it.

O, the grantor! or We all Know This

2009-05-04T13:50:00.000-06:00

"Welcome to the California Western Bar/Bri program. This is a wonderful program, but it will not be a wonderful time in your life. We all know this."

This is how my day started.

This is how my day continued: (Yes, I was updating this during class. So sue me.)

9:00: Things I've been told to remember: To eat, to sleep, to not push away those I care about. Nothing about playing Viva Pinata or Fable 2. Nothing about going to the beach, or exercising. My body is already starting to reject this situation.

9:13: Just found out we're supposed to study 5-8 hours per day, in addition to the five hours we spend in class each day. So, that means if I get out of class at 1 in the afternoon, and get home at like 1:30, if I study non-stop, the fastest I'll be done is 6;30?? And, that is not including breaks! I need like a million breaks or else I lose my mind. When will I eat?! When will I have time to play soccer?! This is not going to be a good three months, not good at all. But, the money's already been spent, so I have to go through with this.

9:43: "It is going to feel bad. It isn't going to feel good. You are going to be very uncomfortable."

10:40: I haven't eaten since my Cinnamon Toast Crunch at 7:15, and I think I may actually be starving to death. We're getting a ten minute break - that should be long enough to eat the sandwich I brought. No one else is eating, or seems hungry though....what is with these robots?

10:47: Watching a video of some idiot talking about property law. A video? All that money doesn't even buy us a real life person? Total rip.

10:55: Video lady just said "kickin it old school."

10:55: Realized that I can't write this and pay attention, this video is CRAZY fast. We have to fill in the blanks for stuff in our workbooks while we watch, or else we won't have complete notes and we will fail our lives.

11:43: First ten minute break of the video. Some people broke out sandwiches this time. The video lady is funny, and constantly having to write stuff down in the blanks makes it easy to pay attention. It isn't thaaaat bad.

12:48: Ten minute break number two. I hate this so much. I no longer think video lady is funny. I no longer laugh at her jokes. Now, I just get annoyed that she is joking around when I am so miserable, and that she is wasting precious time with jokery instead of just telling us about stupid property law. Plus, I'm starving and I forgot a fork so I can't even eat my pasta salad. And, my legs are so so sore (from soccer) that I can't stand sitting in this uncomfortable chair any longer! My knees feel like they're having growing pains, just all cramped and sore. This is pure misery, I can't stand the thought of doing this every day for three months. I don't think my backpack will even fit the amount of food it will take to keep me un-starved for a whole day while I'm cramping my mind like this. I can't stand it. I would rather live in Denver for a full year than do this. Also, I've written the word "indefeasible" about 50 times (seriously) and I have no idea what it means. Hopefully, I'll remember to look it up before the end of July. God, I NEED a Coke.

1:48: Done with class for today. About a mile walk to my car, then I go home to figure out what the heck that video lady was even talking about during that whirlwind of information. I think 5-8 hours is a pretty good guess at how long that will take. I hate this.

One Monkey Off My Back or Perfectly Average

2009-05-04T10:25:00.002-06:00

I finally checked my MPRE (professional responsibility exam) score today. My scaled score is 100, which is perfectly average. I needed an 86 to pass, so I got that monkey off my back. I thought I did okay on it, but I wouldn't have been totally surprised if I didn't pass. It was really hard, and very very tricksy.

First Day House/Dog Sitting or Last Day of Freedom

2009-05-03T20:29:00.002-06:00

We started our first day house sitting by cleaning up a front yard TP-ing. Ah, youths. Then, Adam took the dogs to the beach while I cleaned the fridge. I joined him at the beach, and we brought the dogs home tired out. Success.

Now, I've just made dinner (pasta salad and portabello mushrooms or grilled cheese sandwiches, I haven't decided yet) and I'm listening to the "Pop Hits" music station on the TV. WTF is Pop Hits supposed to be? Super slow, annoying, dumb, love songs that you've never heard before in your life? If so, then it is spot on. I haven't heard of any of these so-called artists, except Pink and John Mayer, and I haven't heard the specific songs ever before. I also learned that when people describe punk as "poppy," they must not mean it is ACTUALLY poppy, because this is pop and this is not poppy. This is slow and boring and annoying.

Anyway. Today is my last day of freedom - tomorrow I start my Bar/Bri classes. It is going to suck so so bad, I'm fully dreading it.

I took some pics of the view from the patio (where we will be taking all our meals) and the view from the master suite, to make you all jealous, but I left my camera cord thingy at home so just imagine pictures of a beautiful palm tree-lined sunset with waves crashing.

Dog-Sitter Extraordinaire

2009-04-29T11:56:00.003-06:00

Last night's dinner at Professor's house resulted in being hired as their dog-sitter for two weeks. The old man and I start Sunday. They have two dogs - one normal; one a bit neurotic, but not that bad at all. Compared to Max, they are awesome dogs. And there is a cat. And some fish.

We'll be living at their house for those two weeks, which will rule because they live about two miles from our apartment, in Sunset Cliffs. It is one of the nicest areas in San Diego, and is the area where I want to live someday. Nice, but unpretentious. Respectable. Plus, there are awesome views, the beach is a block away (better than our current three blocks), and we have free reign of their food and drinks while they're gone. We'll have to feed the dogs, give the dogs our utmost attention, and take them to the beach every day. A dog-sitter was already all lined up, but once Professor saw my old man and I at my graduation (mainly my old man, she LOVES LOVES LOVES him for some weird reason) she decided that we were the only people trustworthy enough to take on this task. (I don't see what's so good about me, but apparently I give off an "I won't kill or lose your dogs" vibe.) So the other dog-sitter was told never mind, and we were brought on. Compensation was not discussed, so I don't know if there will be any further compensation (besides the nice house and smorgasbord) or what.

Besides that, dinner was good. Professor is a self-proclaimed Jewish Mother, and she fully lives up to that title. I was completely stuffed. Dessert alone included brownies, cheesecake, and ice cream. And, one of the best things about my old man is he is very polite, and really good at talking to people about anything so True Adults always love him and he takes the pressure off of me. He ends up doing a good part of the talking and I end up looking good by association. Plus, he is a good eater, which moms also like. So, it wasn't all awkward and weird.

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Now playing: Propagandhi - Supporting Caste
via FoxyTunes

Kind of Weird

2009-04-28T18:28:00.003-06:00

So, I got my J.D. yesterday, and today I am writing my resume to apply for a minimum wage job at a vegan bakery down the street. Getting rid of all the descriptions of the legal mumbo jumbo I did, to be replaced with my experience working at a gourmet dog treat bakery before law school. Kind of a weird feeling. Strange to think that none of what I did in Denver will help me get this job. Strange to be down-playing my education (so they don't think I'm too cool for school) and hyping up the few months I spent at the dog treat bakery.

I didn't realize a resume would be required for a job like this...I think I'd just be a cashier type person, not an actual baker. As far as "pointless minimum wage jobs" go, it could get much worse. This place is local (right around the corner), locally owned, and vegan. If I hadn't wasted a million dollars going to school, and had no aspirations to save the world, it would be very close to a dream job (assuming I would get to become an actual baker).

Doing it to it.

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Now playing: Fireworks - I Support Same Sex Marriage
via FoxyTunes

What Up Doc

2009-04-28T10:00:00.002-06:00

I graduated from law school yesterday. Thus, my new name is: Doctor Leslie (I've heard I shouldn't reveal my last name). Naturally, you can call me Doc. Unfortunately, I won't be able to add "esquire" to the end of my name until I pass the bar.

For those wishing to challenge my new name: I have a juris doctorate degree - a doctor of laws. Yes, virtually no lawyers go by "doctor," however I am unlike virtually all lawyers. Plus, I'm sort of joking, although I will answer to Doc from now on, and all airline tickets and the like will be purchased by Doctor Leslie. (Sidenote: I will also answer to Rev or The Reverend, but no one has ever wanted to call me that.) I gave that school enough time and money to deserve to be Doc. So there.

I can't wait to see how much my car insurance goes down with my new title.

P.S.: Going to dinner at an ex-professor's house tonight. Just me and the old man. We're friends now. We have discussions. Like equals. Do you know how rare that is? (I hope people get this joke.)

Soccer + Vegas

2009-04-24T11:20:00.002-06:00

When I got back to SD, I re-joined my indoor and outdoor soccer teams. This weekend, my outdoor team is playing a tournament in Las Vegas. Last year, I think we lost every game. So, this year we put ourselves one division lower (the lowest division), and my team has gotten WAY better since last year, so hopefully we will be able to hold our own. I'm actually hoping that we'll kill the other teams, and they'll complain that we should be in a higher division. We have three games on Saturday, and at least one on Sunday - more if we are winners. Don't worry, the games aren't the usual hour and a half, they're only forty minutes. So, it will be tough, but not crazily tough. And, luckily, it isn't supposed to be crazy hot this weekend.

My old man decided not to come, so it will be just me and a bunch of people I know, but don't hang out with other than for soccer-related stuff. I'm trying to think of some funny/crazy things to do so I will be the life of the party. I already have one idea, involving whipped cream, so we'll see if I think of anything else. I'm mainly planning on spending the weekend trying to not spend any money. Not the most fun thing to do in Vegas. I'm not looking forward to it that much, but hopefully I'll have fun anyway.

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Now playing: Fireworks - Closet Weather
via FoxyTunes

Let the Countdown Begin

2009-04-20T14:27:00.002-06:00

Last week I changed the name of this blog to "Fifteen Weeks," and put up a new banner. I don't think anyone noticed, except my old man. Explanation follows.

In fifteen weeks, I'll be taking the CA bar exam. A.K.A. the worst test known to man. It is three days long (the first day is on my birthday, of all days!), six hours a day. The first day is essays, the second day is multiple choice, the third day is more essays. The CA bar exam is considered to be the hardest bar exam in all the land, with NY and FL not too far behind. Respect.

Sidenote: For those who don't know (I didn't know any of this crap before I went to law school), one has to pass the bar exam for whatever state one wants to practice law in - its how one gets a license to practice law, essentially. It costs a fortune. All the bar-related fees I've paid so far comes out to a bit over $1,200. Then, once you pass, you have to pay more fees to stay a member of the bar. It sucks.

Before I take the test, I'll be taking a class called Bar/Bri, starting May 4. Bar/Bri is the name of the company that does the class, and pretty much everyone takes this class before taking the Bar. Especially in CA, because our test is so hard - in other states, it isn't as big of a deal. Why the class? Because, the Bar tests you on 16 (I think) subjects, many of which people have forgotten about by the time they graduate. Example: I took contract law, property law, criminal law, civil procedure, and tort law in my first year of school. The Bar will test on all of those subjects. I have a vague idea of those laws, but not a good enough idea to be tested on it three years later. So, Bar/Bri is like a super fast paced review of what you learned in school before the test. They also teach you test taking skills and what have you. Also, a few subjects are tested that I haven't taken a class on - like remedies and community property. There simply isn't enough time in law school to take all the Bar subject classes - especially since I am doing environmental law, which isn't tested on the Bar. So, Bar/Bri also gives the student a crash course in any subjects the student didn't take in school.

I realize I am not consistently capitalizing/not capitalizing Bar - hopefully I'll figure out which I want to go with by the end of the summer. Deal.

For now, however, I have three more weeks of freedom before Bar/Bri starts. I graduate law school in exactly one week. Crazy. I'm spending my time off playing video games, cooking, doing chores ("You're in charge of cleaning, since you don't have anything else to do" - my old man), reading, going to the beach, and worrying about not having a job/money. It is so fun not having school or a job. I need to get a ton of money, quick, so I can live like this forever. Anyone know of any promising pyramid schemes?

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Now playing: P.O.S. - Drumroll (We're All Thirsty)
via FoxyTunes

Our Seder = Fail.

2009-04-15T11:05:00.000-06:00

Growing up, my family would go to a Seder every year around Easter with a group from church. The Seder would be the same night as our church Easter egg hunt, one of the highlights of my year (although I was so focused on conserving my candy reserves until Halloween, I would end up eating hardly any of it). If you don't know what a Seder is, it is basically a Jewish ritual/meal that (I think) takes place the first night of Passover. You can read about the Seder on Wikipedia here, which I'm sure is filled with half-truths and un-truths, but I don't know any better either, so go for it.

So, back to these Seders I'd have to go to as a kid: When kids got to a certain age (what age? I don't know...10-ish maybe?) they would be promoted from having to hang out in the "babysitting room" (a really boring room with really old, crappy, broken, dirty toys, a bunch of kids that you're not even really friends with but you have to be cordial to because this is church, with weird/disturbing Christian kid videos playing). The now-old-enough kid would then get to go to the Seder dinner with all the growns ups instead of the creepy "babysitting room." (After doing the Easter egg hunt, of course, no kid ever got too old for that.) As you can tell, I hated the babysitting room, (Aside: my brother gave me my first bloody nose in the "babysitting room" by knocking me over when I was sitting in a chair) so when my promotion came it was great. I was finally going to get to see what this top-secret Seder dinner was all about. It turned out, like the "babysitting room," it was pretty boring.

This was a Catholic church, I should note. I think they did the Seder because that was Jesus' Last Supper - so it was some sort of morbid recreation of Jesus' last night. (The church also did an Easter play thing (I can't think of the official name) where they reinacted Jesus' last day, including actually whipping the poor guy who played Jesus. And, I mean whipping him hard. Like, "Jesus" would be screaming and there would be blood. Like, as in a real life version of "Passion of the Christ." With children watching! Disturbing, terrifying, and confusing? Yes. No joke - Dad & Bear Bear, leave a comment and confirm this went down.) However, I think the real reason they did the Seder was more because it involves drinking four glasses of wine than it was the ritual aspect of it. These are Catholics we're talking about, remember. (I know, obvious joke, but whatever.)

Note: The kiddies didn't drink wine, we had grape juice. Still, four glasses of grape juice (combined with the Easter candy) will give a kid some sugar rush!

Unfortunately (because it would make an awesome story), I have no memories of anyone at the Seder acting intoxicated. But, it must've happened. I was just too young to notice that stuff yet.

After the Seder, we would have a potluck dinner. Hmm...or maybe the Seder and the potluck were two separate nights and I am just confusing them into one marathon of a night? Dad - do you remember if the potluck was the same night as the Seder? It seems like it should've been two separate nights because (to a child's mind, at least) the Seder took forever, and we all would've starved to death by the time it was over. Anyway, this particular potluck was another one of the highlights of my year because someone (the Gavins, I think) would always bring Matzo Ball Soup (capitalized because something this tasty must be a proper noun). It was the only day I would ever get to have that soup all year, and it was glorious. The broth was probably chicken-based, but I didn't care about that back then, and there were no meat-chunks, so I ate it happily and it was so so good.

This year, I was super happy to find a vegan recipe for matzo ball soup in my Vegan With A Vengeance cookbook. I made it a couple of days ago (not on the day the Seder is supposed to happen on, because we were still out of town). It was a complete failure. The balls fell apart in the salt water they were supposed to cook in, so I ended up with matzo ball broth/sludge. The old man loves it anyway though, and is committed to eating the entire pot of failure. I was so so sad, I had such high hopes for my soup. And, I did everything exactly as the recipe says, so I don't even know where I went wrong or if I shoudl try it again. Booo.

We didn't do any of the "normal" Seder stuff, although we did attempt to drink the four glasses of wine (only made it through one glass each), and I did open the door to see if Elijah wanted to come have a bowl of soup with us. He didn't, and I don't blame him since I ruined the soup. So, our "Seder" was basically just eating failure matzo ball soup and drinking a bit of wine. Next year I am going to nail the soup. No pun intended.

The Easter Bunny That Never Was

2009-04-12T12:39:00.000-06:00

One year, when I was a small child (maybe 4? maybe 5? maybe 3?) we spent the night before Easter at my Grandma Chac's house, and did our Easter morning festivities there. Just as I had done every Easter, I woke up and immediately headed out to see what kind of loot the Easter Bunny had left for me. The Easter Bunny was almost better than Santa because he/she gave you way more candy, and you didn't even have to be good to get it!

This one fateful Easter morn', I walked through the kitchen door just in time to see the Easter bunny his/herself hopping out the front door with my Grandma's broom! That wascally wabbit.

Several years later, I asked my parents who was dressed up as the Easter bunny that year. I suspected it was Uncle Jerry because the Easter bunny was sort of short, and so is Jerry. My parents looked at me like I was nuts and told me that this whole memory I have of seeing the Easter bunny steal my Grandma's broom never happened!

I had lived for YEARS with this memory, completely convinced that it really did happen - never having the slightest suspicion that my brain somehow made this whole thing up! Even today, I can remember it so clearly, it is hard (impossible!) to believe it never happened. My theory is it must've been a very realistic dream, and since it coincided with a holiday with much excitement, my brain must've stored it away as important. And, since I was so young I must've just thought about it a lot (as I said, for years) and tricked my mind into thinking it was a real memory instead of a memory of a dream. Still, it is so crazy for me to come to terms with this broom-stealing incident never happening. I am so sure it happened that I lean more towards thinking the entire world has conspired against me to trick me into thinking this never happened than I do towards truly believing it never happened.

Alas, the mind is a terrible thing.

Made It!

2009-04-10T09:57:00.002-06:00

Last night we got to my parents' house in Canyon Country, safe and sound. Our trip was good; we were one day ahead of stormy weather the whole time, so we got really lucky. I was going to write a post for each day, but I never had the internet, and I've realized it is annoying to write about things that aren't fresh on my mind. But, I'll post pics and stuff when I get the chance.

Quick run down:

Durango = Westerny tourist town.
Mesa Verde National Park = Cool cliff dwellings, but all the trees were burned down so the landscape was pretty boring.
Four Corners National Monument = Navajos will rip you off every chance they get (which they rightfully should, so I can't blame them). Don't go here.
Monument Valley = Again, major ripping off going on. But, our campsite outside the actual "park" had awesome views.
Grand Canyon = Vast.
Laughlin = Nice room at Harrah's for $25 is an awesome deal. Tons of oldies bajoldies. Not bad though, and perfect weather. Like Vegas only not as crowded, no young people acting like idiots, less families running you over with strollers, and smaller (crappier) casinos with not as many games. Oh, and horrible, horrible, horrible food - no celebrity chefs here.

Life is good again, life is good again.

Enhanced Stalking Capabilities

2009-04-03T14:37:00.002-06:00

I just started posting stuff over at posterous.com. Yah, I don't know wtf that is either. But, Rainn Wilson uses it, and that's good enough for me. It is essentially just a mini blog where I will do short posts about things I like, things I hate (probably a lot of posts with this theme), things I think are weird, things I think are funny, etc., etc. Sometimes I just see things online that I have to tell someone about, and if no actual humans are around, I will post about it on posterous. The link, you ask?

Here: http://onesmallinstrument.posterous.com/

So, check it out, add it to your google readers, plz cmnt, and all that crapola.

It's going to be so random!

Homeward Bound

2009-04-02T09:00:00.001-06:00

Total trip = 1352 miles, 25 hours. Or so.

Sunday morning, the journey begins!

First stop, will be getting a coupla' veggie dogs, loaded up Chicago stylee, from Mustard's Last Stand II. Then we hit the road, destination: Durango, CO (B). That is about a 7 hour drive, so we are going to spend the night in Durango at the super nice EconoLodge. Classy.

Monday! We're going to check out Durango, and hopefully get some brew dogs at Ska Brewing, although I don't know what time their tasting room opens so that might not happen. Regardless, I will be stocking up on Ska Brews in Durango because it is my favorite beer (that I just found out about a few days ago), and I support any company that puts ska in their name. We're also going to go on a hike or something at Mesa Verde National Park, where we will most definitely check out the awesome ancient cave dwellings! I am really excited about that. Then, we drive to Monument Valley Navajo Tribal Park (C) (home to (supposedly) the most photographed rock formation - don't worry, I'll take lots of pictures that will look just like all the pictures everyone else has taken!). I'm stoked to see that too. It is about a 3 hour drive to Monument Valley, right on the AZ/UT border. Unfortunately, yes, we will have to dip into Utah - my most hated state. We're planning to camp there, but that will depend on the weather. If not camping, we're going to find a (hopefully) cheap motel to crash in. This will be a long day, so some stuff might have to get cut depending on how soon I get grouchy. As long as my old man keeps me fed, though, I should be good.

Tuesday! Headed to the grandest of canyons - the Grand Canyon. South Rim, the only part open this time o' year. 3.5 hour drive. We're planning to camp there too, but that also will depend on the weather. We don't know if we're going to stay there two nights, or just one - it will depend on the weather and how cool it is there. I hope I see a wild turkey. So badly.

Fourthorfifthday! Drive from the Grand Canyon to Laughlin, NV - the shittiest little shithole in the world! Just kidding, I've never even been there. BUT, every single hotel there is $25 (even the real ones, like Harrah's), and I know the old folks just flock there in droves, so it must be pretty shitty. I'm interested in seeing it, just so I can see how funny it is. There is an In-N-Out there, so it can't be all bad. Grand Canyon --> Laughlin is a 3.5-ish hour drive. I plan on playing Bingo and winning a zillion dollars.

Fifthorsixthday! From Laughlin, to my dear parents' house in good ol' Canyon Country, CA. This drive will be sucky, through the California desert - peppered with drug-cooking trailers and Joshua Trees (is that a proper noun?). 5 hours. I will just be hoping to get through it as quickly as possible. We'll probably stay for the weekend, hanging out with my family and our friend (not plural) in the greater L.A. area. Oh, we're also going to get my mom's food garden all ready.

Lastday! Hoooooooooooooooooome! The drive home is about 2.5 hours, and it will be the best drive of my life. Once I get home, I'll never leave for the rest of my life.

Thunder Snow!

2009-04-01T12:23:00.004-06:00

Have you heard of thunder snow? Me neither! Today the weather lady said that we are going to get some thunder snow tonight...and I was like, wtf is that? Is it snow with thunder? That could be cool. Is it some cool name invented by weather people to get us to "tune in at 9"? Not as cool. The weather lady said it meant we were going to get 4 inches in 1/2 an hour - craziness!

I looked it up on wikipedia, and other more respectable websites, and concluded it is a snowstorm which has thunder and lightning (can't have one without the other!) and ususally unloads a bitch-ton of snow in a short time. Warning: do not click that wikipedia link unless you understand science, it is so confusing. Thunder snow is very rare, only happens about three times a year in the U.S. I hope it happens because I like having rare experiences. Who doesn't?

Plus, I'm going to go snowboarding tomorrow instead of working (yes, I told my boss and she doesn't care) so I am hoping for a ton of powder. Hopefully the roads will be clear, or my plan will be foiled. Regardless, I'm not going to work tomorrow. But, I'd rather shred the gnar than sit at home being bored.

It is 12:30 here now, and it hasn't started snowing yet. Come on thunder snow!

Yelping Elitist

2009-03-27T15:00:00.004-06:00

Do you know what Yelp is? Apparently, it is mainly a California thing (it started in SF), so it isn't as widely-known in other (less cool) states. Basically, it is a website where people review places - mainly restaurants, but stores and events too. It is free to sign up and start reviewing. Yelp is used by a lot of people to figure out where to eat.

I am a very proud Yelp Elite member. Yelp Elite members get an extra special little symbol next to their name, and their reviews should be given the utmost respect. Afterall, becoming a Yelp Elite can be accomplished by invitation only.

Here is how I became Elite:

I started a Yelp account because I was looking for something to do while I was bored during class, and I used Yelp a lot to see if restaurants were good for vegetarians and was annoyed by people's bad reviews. And, I don't mean bad like they were saying the restaurant sucked, I mean bad like spelling and grammar mistakes, using sayings and phrases in the completely wrong way, saying the place has a good happy hour but not saying what the happy hour specials are, and generally just leaving reviews that are either (a) poorly written or (b) completely useless.

So, I started Yelping (yes, Yelp is both a noun and a verb) every restaurant I had been to in San Diego - complete with prices for vegetarian options (when those were fresh in my mind) and all the things that I thought other reviews were lacking. I Yelp with a vegetarian angle, hoping other vegetarians will be able to use Yelp to see what their options are at different restaurants, the same way I had been using Yelp.

Fairly soon after I started Yelping, I got a "friend request" from some guy I didn't know who had a million friends. Yes, you can have "friends" on Yelp, like on social networking sites. I denied the friend request because I didn't know this guy and since he had a million friends I assumed he was just some FON (freak of nature). Then this guy started giving me compliments. (You can give people compliments on their reviews, which then show up in the Yelper's profile). And, he kept requesting to be my friend. Finally, I just accepted because it was annoying and I didn't really care.

It turns out, that guy is like the head Yelp guy for San Diego, and I guess he has so many Yelp friends because it is his job to befriend Sandy Eggans. This dude is also in charge of the weekly Yelp newsletter (which one of my reviews was featured in) and I think he is in charge of making people Elite. I guess he liked my reviews, and thus I became a Yelping Elitist.

Now, you may be thinking "who cares about being an Elitist." Well, you get invited to exclusive Elite events (with free food and drinks and by drinks I mean alcohol!). I haven't gotten to go to any yet though, because I'm stuck in stupid Denver.

So, if you want to be an Elite member, get started writing reviews that aren't useless, with proper grammar and spelling. Good luck!

Also, if you Yelp, add me to be your friend: iliedmyfaceoff.yelp.com. I only have three friends, and I'm only actually friends with one of them!

Now, how do I get paid to review the food I eat? That is the question. None of my skills are pay-worthy!

The Future

2009-03-26T13:00:00.002-06:00

Yes, I plan on blogging once I go home - I wouldn't want my six readers to have nothing to read. (Holla at my six readers!) But, you should still savor the posts from these last 8 (!!!!!) days because I will never again be this unhappy for this long in my entire life! Ah, the worst is over.

It is a crazy blizzard here today. I've seen some big snowstorms in my day, and this one of the worst - it supposed to snow 12-16 inches here. That is a lot, considering it hasn't snowed enough to stick around for more than a day all winter. But, this screws my morning commute...who knows how long the bike path will be icy after this. I started walking to the bus this morning, and in just one block I had about an inch of snow on me. Seriously. I couldn't see the headlights from cars until the cars were right by me. I decided it was too dangerous to trust the bus with getting me to and from work in one piece. So, I worked from home today.

My favorite hot sauce is Valentina. No pic, blogger is being broken. This hot sauce is legit, and it costs less than a dollar at the grocery store. I started using it after seeing it was the hot sauce of choice for true Mexicans - none of that Tex-Mex bullsh.

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Now playing: A Wilhelm Scream - Anchor End
via FoxyTunes

This Is So Boring

2009-03-25T18:58:00.002-06:00

Nothing new to report, really. Just checking in so you don't begin to worry.

Only 7 more days of work left! Woo hoo! Only 9 days total left! Then, back to the good life.

Oh, here's an update: Remember when I posted about the oil and gas regulations EJ has been pushing for? Well, the regulations passed today! That means more environmental protections for areas where oil and gas leasing goes on, and that means more protections for our health! If you were smart enough to send the EJ take action thingy I linked to in that post - thank you. You won! That kind of stuff does make an impact on these state-level issues. Hopefully these regulations will set the bar for other states.

I guess now I could rant about wins are so rare for us enviros...
Environmental law is a business of losing. We lose so so much. So, when we win, it is the best. We tell ourselves it isn't really losing, because we informed a bitch-ton of people about these environmental issues along the way, so if we lost in the end and the horrible factory got built anyway, at least these people know more about these environmental issues. It is very common to hear an enviro lawyer say "we've never won with this judge, and we're not going to win this time, but we have to try anyway." Why do we always lose? Oh, I could go on for days! Or, I could just say - politics.

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Now playing: You, Me, And Everyone We Know - ...Because I Spit Hot Fire
via FoxyTunes

Embracing The Kooky

2009-03-21T20:21:00.004-06:00

Chances are, you know (or have known) someone who was alive during the Great Depression. And, I'm sure you noticed some kooky thing that person did, and then credited living through the Great Depression for that kookiness. Example: My Grandma Chac did just about every kooky thing a person from the G.D. would do, but I'd like to point out that she saved every single rubber band that ever crossed her path. This sticks out in my mind because - seriously - when do you ever wish you had a rubber band? Like, never. Unless you want to shoot someone with it, there is no reason to ever want a rubber band. But, my Grandma Chac's doorknob was chock full of rubber bands. Ancient, cracking rubber bands. The old girl didn't live long enough to explain to me what purpose these rubber bands would serve, and so it remains a mystery.

My point is, the G.D. shaped the character of those who lived through it. It made them kooky, in our opinion. Meanwhile, I, and many like me, learned about the G.D. in school and thought, "Ha! Those fools, they ignored all the signs that such a crash was coming! That could never happen nowadays." And, we grew up to consume, consume, consume. And, we scoffed at our elders' kookiness. How quickly we humans forget!

Now, times they are a-changin'. Not to say these times are of G.D. caliber, because that is annoying and cliche to say - plus I hate economics and therefore don't know a ton about it, so I have no right to compare this to that with any (claimed) authority. However, I do believe these times will shape the character of us all, and we're going to come out of this as better people, and as a better world. Get ready to kookify yourself.

I think we can all agree that greed was a major factor contributing to these tough times we've found ourselves in. Collectively, I don't think my generation looks at greed as a bad thing. I think a lot of people don't even (until a few months ago) thought of it as greed, but more of a desire to get ahead of everyone else no matter what. The American Dream! I think we'll all become a bit kooky, and we'll decide that greed is not a desirable trait, and we'll realize helping each other is the only way to get us all out of this situation. We really are going to be left with no choice but to work together and help out whoever we can whenever we can. We are all going to be much nicer to each other when this is over!

And, the history books will mark this economic downturn as the savior of the environment. One of the main contributing factors to the terrible state our environment is in is over-consumption. Extreme, un-checked over-consumption that we should all be ashamed of. But, if we don't have any money, we can't drive our SUVs to Wal-Mart and fill our plastic shopping cart with a bunch of plastic crap, and stuff it into plastic bags. The American Dream! And, the coal power plant that gives the plastic factory its energy won't have to spew as much pollution into our air. And, we'll realize that the world keeps spinning even if we don't go to Wal-Mart! How kooky we'll become! As a result, the Earth will live to see another day.

And, the way we look at food is going to have to change too. Our economy is screwed, and due to droughts, over-consumption, and pollution, we don't have any water. I'm no economist, and I'm no farmer, but that's a recipe for an agricultural disaster if I've ever heard one. Remember learning about the Dust Bowl that unfortunately coincided with the G.D.? We're going to have to start growing our own food. After all, a pack of seeds costs about a million percent less than buying all the food that pack of seeds can produce. I think we'll find that gardening actually makes us forget about our economic woes, and is actually relaxing - kooky! We'll even prefer home grown food to all others - kooky! I don't know what we're going to do about the water situation, contrary to what I have led you to believe, I don't have it all figured out yet. We will definitely have more water once all this over-consumption nonsense stops. (Do you know how much water it takes to make that plastic crap at Wal-Mart? A bitch-ton.) And, with no money, we'll have to stop eating out and make meals with the stuff from our gardens, and eat it with our families at home. Super kooky.

So, as you can see, according to my predictions we are all going to be a lot better off once this economic down turn is over. Yes, we have tough times ahead of us. Unknown, really annoying tough times. But, I'm confident that we will take this chance to help others through this while we can, and then we'll have people to help us when we need it. The best part is we don't have to wait for Congress to pass legislation to do that! We don't have to listen to the higher-ups argue about who took how much money from who (figures that are so huge they aren't even real to us commoners). We don't need no stinkin' government to be kind to each other! KOOKY!

I still don't see where the rubber bands fit into all this, but, just to be safe, I suggest you start stockpiling them. The best place to keep them is on a door knob, preferably near the kitchen. The secret may be hidden away in Grandma Chac's diaries somewhere, but she wrote a diary entry every day for I don't even know how many years, so it will take forever to uncover.

In the future our grandkids will ask their parents why we are so kooky, and they will be told it is because we lived through the [whatever they're going to call this, if it will even turn out to be significant enough to get a name]. And those younglings will think, "Ha! Those idiots didn't pay attention to all the signs that they were screwed! That could never happen nowadays." And then, at some point not too long after that thought, it will happen again. How quickly we humans forget!

And, in several hundred years or so, something (I imagine it will be an alien, you can imagine whatever you want) will look at everything us know-it-all humans have ever done and say: "They never learned."

My Life = Vacation

2009-03-17T12:57:00.003-06:00

Thx fr yr cmnts on yesterday's complaint. Of course, I am feeling fine today. I've been masterminding getting my ultimate dream job for three years, and everything has fallen in to place so far. Not even old Bernie Madoff can stop me now.

I am so so so so excited to be going home in less than three weeks. It is my dream come true. Imagine how excited you are when you are about to go on vacation. Now imagine how excited you would be if that vacation was going to be your actual LIFE. That is how I feel.

People go to San Diego for vacation, man. They spend a bitch-ton of money to go there. I just get to live there in my normal life. Awesome! Not only do I get to live there in my normal life, but I get to live a mere three blocks from the beach. Score! And, since I won't be in school and won't have a job, I'll get to do nothing but play video games, cook, read, hang out at the beach, ride my bike, play soccer, and do WHATEVER ELSE I WANT for like a whole month before I have to start studying for the bar. Sweet! And, all of those things I like to do don't even cost any money!

AND I get to do all of that with my old man! (I just hope he hasn't thrown away all of my stuff yet...I checked on some things when I visited San Diego, but I wasn't able to do a full inventory.)

Life is going to be good again, life is going to be good again. I will never ever ever ever ever leave home again.

More Bad Job-Hunting News

2009-03-16T10:01:00.003-06:00

This morning I read this horrible article:

http://www.cnn.com/2009/CRIME/03/16/lawyer.layoff.public/index.html?eref=rss_us

I know you won't read it, so I'll just tell you what it says. Huge law firms that pay their attorneys a bitch-ton of money are laying people off, but not technically laying them off because they are given the option of working at a PUBLIC INTEREST law firm for a lower salary and then I guess they can go back to making the big bucks when the economy picks up. (A lot of people are actually getting laid off too, though.)

There are also students who have been hired by these firms to start in the fall (law students generally get hired at least a year before they are supposed to start working, so a ton of people were hired before the economy got this bad - when there was still hope). These people are being told they can defer their start date for a year, and the company will give them between $60,000-$75,000 DURING THE YEAR THEY AREN'T EVEN WORKING! They are encouraged to get jobs at public interest firms during this deferred year. Of course, they would be idiots not to do that because if you are trying to make sure you don't get laid off, you are going to do whatever your boss "encourages" you to do.

Why does this majorly suck for me? Because. I am trying to get a job in the public sector! There are no jobs in the public sector because these groups rely on donations to pay lawyers, and everyone has a white-knuckle grip on their money so they aren't making donations. Yes, there is TONS of work to be done, but these groups can't afford to hire anyone to do the work, so they just make do with the people they already have. But now, thanks to these idiot law firms paying people to work in the public sector, these public sector firms will be able to get lawyers to work for them without having to pay them! Because the big firms are paying them. Follow?

I quote: "Some attorneys and law students worry that paying corporate attorneys to work in public interest firms may displace those who actually wanted to work in the public sector in the first place. Jocelyn E. Getgen, who works with students at Cornell Law School, said strained legal aid organizations and nonprofits will want to take in the "free" labor." The article does not go on to give hope to "those who actually wanted to work in the public sector in the first place" (I love how that makes us sound like total freaks). The article has that one quote, and then gets back to discussing how great it is that all these big-firmers are able to get paid what I consider to be good money to actually help people.

The other thing that is really annoying about all this is that this big shot lawyers feel like they are doing some huge public service by working in the public sector while still getting paid way more than these public interest firms would ever be able to pay them! They think they are angels or something when in reality they are only helping poor people because their boss told them that their only choice was to have no job, or help poor people and still get a paycheck. Hmm..hard decision. And these are BIG firms doing this. This is happening to A LOT of people. My chances of getting a job just diminished BIG TIME.

I'm so mad and sad and frustrated and tired of going back and forth between convincing myself that I will definitely get a job and then learning more and more stuff about how there are no jobs and still trying to force myself to stay positive. It is exhausting trying to stay positive these days. I am exhausted.

NO ONE is thinking about what people like me are supposed to do. I never ever narver would have thought it would be this hard to get a job when I am fully willing to be HAPPY making $35,000 just to do environmental law work. That is NOTHING compared to what most lawyers make. That is NOTHING compared to what most any-job people make. I am saying I will take basically NOTHING (and be happy to do it!) as long as someone just gives me a job, and no one wants to! And then I have to look at my bank account and try to figure out how many more months I can survive. This weekend I had to send the necessary documents to my financial aid office to get another $1200 loan to cover the CA bar fees. This whole situation is seriously fucked.

I'm supposed to call this lady at my school's career services office today to talk to her about how fucked I am. She is the only one there who accepted me when, as a 1L, I told her I wanted to work in non-profit environmental law, and that is all I want to do. She is the only one who didn't try to talk me into working as a personal injury attorney so I will actually be able to pay my bills, have a higher salary, and thereby make the school's alumni stats look better. But now I don't even think I can call her and talk to her without crying. And I don't cry easily.

Weekend in Review

2009-03-15T17:31:00.004-06:00

Graduation invites I "made".

Saturday:

Went snowboarding for a couple hours. Didn't hit traffic. It was boring though because there was no powder, and powder is the only thing I care about in life. It is my only thrill.

Delved into the trees in an unknown area, following tracks though. I was in there for a REALLY long time, with no lifts or groomed trails in sight. I thought I may have gotten myself on a path that will end me up at the bottom of the mountain, or at a road or something. It was hard-packed, so I was going really fast and it was scary to avoid the trees. Then, I finally came out on a groomer and ended up at the stupid lift that I was trying to get away from. Don't know how.

Played Wii for a lot of time.

Tetris Party pwns. If you have a Wii, you simply must download Tetris Party now and then play it online with me. It is WiiWare, $12. Fully worth it. So, so fun. If you (or your wife) don't have a Wii, buy one, then see above.
I smashed my hand really really hard into the wooden part of my ottoman playing Boom Blox. The point of the game is to throw a ball at these blox to knock gems over (sounds retarded, but it is really fun). I was at a hard part so I was trying to throw the ball as hard as I could, and hit the ottoman on the follow through. My knuckles are all cut. I don't remember if I knocked the gems down. Today my shoulder is sore from doing all those throws.

Cooked a giant pot of pinto + black beans.

Sunday:

Made some bomb tofu scramble for the first time, compliments of Vegan with a Vengeance. I thought it was going to be disgusting, because I tasted it before it was fully done and it just tasted like pure tofu, which is a sick flavor. But, it turned out dank in the end.
Got a 50% off any full price thing coupon for Michael's, so I decided to go and buy some invitations for my graduation. I really only needed four invitations. They didn't have any pre-made ones, so I ended up spending roughly TWO HOURS looking around to see if I could get some stuff to make them for a decent price. Everything there is crazily over-priced. I finally ended up getting some card-stock w/ envelopes, some paper flowers (which I layered to make them look cooler), a "permanent" glue stick, a blue glittery creamy pen, and four little glass magnets to put in the envelopes for people to use to put the invites on their fridge (as an added bonus) (and yes, I thought of that, I did not steal the idea from Martha Stewart). I made it out only spending $6.50. Success.

I say I "made" the invitations because all I really did was picked out stuff that I thought looked good, then glued things together. But, that is all a lot of people on Etsy do too, and they make money off it, so...

I ate a dank sauce taco salad for dinner.
Now I think I'm going to play Wii until it gets boring.

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Now playing: +44 - 155
via FoxyTunes

Adults Acting Like New Borns

2009-03-13T10:35:00.007-06:00

When I ride my bike to work, I leave it in this "locker" in the alley by the EJ building. The locker is actually just a small closet. I don't know what it was supposed to be for - it seems weird to have a closet with one door, leading to the alley. I don't know why they call it a locker. Anyway.

Today I forgot my key to the locker, so I brought my bike up to the third floor with me and just put it in my office. No big deal. Then, my boss came in and told me for some reason this building has a major issue with bikes, and we aren't allowed to bring our bikes in the elevator or the landlords will flip out. Apparently, a lawyer who used to work here rode his bike every day, and he thought the no bikes in the building rule was retarded, so he would bring his bike into his office every day anyway. The landlord made a huge stink about it, and tried to sue EJ and evict them from the building. Because this guy brought his bike into the office. I agree, it doesn't make any sense. What's so bad about it? I have no idea.

Then my boss told me that people here had told her about this bike situation when she first started, and she had brought her bike up a few times anyway, when she didn't have a key, thinking it is no big deal. One day, the landlord himself got into the elevator with her and honestly told her that she LOST HER ELEVATOR PRIVILEGES because she brought her bike into the building. Seriously. A grown ass man telling a grown ass woman that she lost her elevator privileges! How they would ever know that she took the elevator, I don't know. There aren't security guards here or anything. Crazy. I WISH he would've tried saying something to me.

So, I asked my boss if I could borrow her key so I could go put my bike down there, but she said it was no big deal and that I should take it in the elevator when I leave because there is nothing they can say about it once I'm already leaving. Seriously less than five minutes later, the office manager (who is very nice) came in and saw my bike. She got all weird, like she wanted to tell me how fucked I am for daring to bring my bike up here, but she wanted to be nice and not make me feel weird about it, so she didn't know what to do. So I just said, "I know [my boss] already told me." But, that wasn't the end of it! She went and got me another key and had me go back down there and put my bike in the locker! She said if the landlord came in here today and saw it, it would be really bad.

I am just amazed by the amount of drama that surrounds this bike situation here. A lawsuit. A threatened eviction. The loss of elevator privileges. It is true insanity. And it is ADULTS who are acting like this! I'd really like to give that landlord a piece of my mind. If he would've told me that I lost my elevator privileges, I would have died laughing, thinking he was joking! Then, when I found out he was serious, I would have said that first, there is no way you will know if I take the elevator or not, second, I don't even actually work here, and third, it is only three floors which is cinchy to just take the stairs for, so your punishment is actually no punishment at all!

In other news, a professor from my school came here today to do a "site visit" per American Bar Association requirements. To make sure this place is legit. It was basically me, this professor, and my two bosses, sitting in the conference room with my two bosses gushing over how great I am. It was so embarassing.

Too bad being the greatest intern in the universe doesn't get you a paycheck or a job offer these days. Which is the most frustrating thing I have ever felt. What is the point of doing good work if it isn't worth anything to anyone?

A Day In My Life

2009-03-12T17:21:00.002-06:00

This is basically what my M-F looks like.

8:10 a.m.: Wake up, take a shower, get ready (while I see what the news thinks the weather is like), drink a glass of water, grab something to take to work for breakfast, grab my bento. Leave house around 8:40.
Ride my bike to work, get there around 9-ish.
While my computer turns on (20 minutes) I eat whatever I brought for breakfast. Usually fruit, sometimes toast or a sandwich.
Around 10:30, or whenever I get hungry, I eat a snack. Fruit, veggies + hummus, or string cheese.
I work until noon and listen to last.fm radio. I ban every Aquabats, Ataris, and Saves the Day song, but it keeps playing them anyway - convinced I should like those bands. It is annoying.
12:00 p.m.: Walk a few blocks to Subway and refill my plastic cup with ice tea. When I get back to work, I heat up and eat my lunch whilst reading my Google Reader stuff. Then, back to work.
Around 2 I eat a snack if I am starving.
I leave sometime between 4:15-5:00 depending on how bored I am, what the weather is doing, and if I am at a good place to stop working (so I don't have to spend an hour the next day figuring out what I was doing). No one notices when I arrive, or when I leave, so it doesn't matter. I ride my bike home.
When I get home, usually around 5, I make my dinner. Eating an early dinner is better for one's health, plus I am always starving when I get home from work, plus that way I am in and out of the kitchen before the people upstairs make their dinner, so I'm not a bother.
I let Max in while my dinner is cooking.
I eat my dinner and watch TV in my cave. Usually Seinfeld but sometimes whatever weird show is on MTV or Food Network.
Max comes with me. I yell at him until he eventually falls asleep, usually with some part of him touching my foot. "Stop it, you big dummy!" "Ew dude, you are seriously disgusting!" "Get out of here!" "What is with you?" "Max. Lay. Down!" "Stop sniffing everything you annoying idiot!" Etc.
I play Animal Crossing for however long I want. Sometimes just long enough to check my mail and buy whatever I need from Nook, sometimes for like an hour.
I watch TV, do pointless stuff on the internet, listen to music, make my bento for the next day, and talk to my old man on the phone at some point during the next few hours.
At least an hour before my bedtime (11:00 p.m.) I start reading, and read until my bedtime.
11:00 p.m.: I start trying to sleep. Sometimes I fall asleep right away, sometimes it takes like 3 hours.

Pure Heaven

2009-03-10T19:01:00.003-06:00

I just made a batch of vegan meatballs, compliments of vegandad.blogspot.com, with a few modifications:

I used a little less than a tablespoon of poultry seasoning instead of the spices he lists because I want to use these for sweet & sour meatballs once I get to Safeway tomorrow to get the sauce. So, I didn't want them to be Italian-seasoned.
I use 1 tablespoon A1, 1 overflowing tablespoon BBQ sauce, and 1 tablespoon ketchup instead of 2 tablespoons A1/HP Sauce/BBQ sauce like he says.
I don't put in any parsley or fennel seed.

I've made these meatballs a bunch of times before, but this is hands down the best batch I've ever made. I'm dying for how good these things are. It might be because I used a different brand of tempeh than I normally do. I don't know, it is DANK.

Then I made a meatball sandwich with marinara sauce I made last night, and a slice of vegan mozzarella cheese. I didn't even notice the cheese though, so it's not worth having. I've never gotten to have a meatball sandwich, and it is the best invention.

I can't believe it is already 7. I had to walk a mile to the free shuttle bus today because the weatherman lied and it snowed last night - enough to make riding my bike impossible. It was SO COLD this morning, I couldn't believe it. I was wearing my hot chilly's (pants that go under my regular pants), jeans, snow boots, a thermal, a t-shirt, a zip-up hoodie, my snowboard jacket, gloves, and a beanie! Of course, after work it was still cold, but not nearly as cold, so by the time I walked back from the bus I was dying of heat exhaustion and was carrying all the clothes that I could take off.

Now I'm watching the Big Fat Loser. I wish I was eating my dank sauce meatball sandwich while I watched it, the people on this show would probably DIE for it.

Home Again, Home Again

2009-03-06T13:06:00.002-07:00

I'm back in SD, baby!

My flight last night got all delayed because of stupid wind. It wasn't that turbulent, but it did get me started thinking that if our plane crashed, and a blockbuster movie was made about it, was my life interesting enough to justify a character in the movie? At first, I decided no, I would not be in the movie. At least I wouldn't be one of the main characters. But, then I remembered that I did the one thing that will GUARANTEE a starring role in any plane crash movie - I had changed my flight from a later one to this earlier flight! So, yes, I would be a main character. Flying home to see my old man, go to the concert of my life with my bro and his girl, and take a legal ethics test. They'd probably have to add in some extra stuff that isn't real, but I'd be in the movie and that's all that really matters.

Then, I started thinking who else on the plane would get to be a main character. Of course, this fancily-dressed black man wearing a very nice (and probably expensive) hat would get a prime part. He was one of the last people on the plane, and he had this humongous Stetson hat box. It was held shut with an old bungee cord. I'm just assuming it was old, I don't know that for a fact. Since he was one of the last people on, all the other jerks had already taken up all the overhead compartment space and they told him he'd have to check this hat box. He didn't like that, but didn't make too much of a stink about it, other than muttering something about how they'd better not ruin his hat. In the end, I saw a stewardess take the hat box to the back of the plane, so I guess they just put it back there instead of checking it, since we were already so late.

The hat would also be a big part of the movie - sort of like the red jacket in Schindler's List. It would show where the man bought the hat, what other hats he tried on, how he loved hats and was known for wearing nice, expensive hats. Then, after the crash, there would be a shot of this hat floating in the water, and the audience would feel clever for remembering this hat from the beginning of the movie, even though it is totally obvious. I don't know what water it would be floating in, since we would crash into land as we weren't flying over any oceans...maybe they'd have to take some liberties with where our plane was going in order to get this heart-wrenching scene with the floating hat.

Anyway. I'm so glad to be home. In Denver, I just go through the motions everyday, just waiting for it to be over. But here, I actually feel like a human again. Tonight is the big concert. Can't wait.

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Now playing: Dashboard Confessional - Turpentine Chaser
via FoxyTunes

The Oil + Gas Industry Sucks A Big One

2009-03-04T10:59:00.003-07:00

Allright, I don't post about every little environmental thing that matters to me, because it would take up all my time and I would no one would care in the end anyway - like with my other blog. But, this is something my boss told me about a few weeks ago, and it is seriously crazy. And it has a human interest angle to it, so maybe people will actually care enough to do something since it isn't "just" the environment.

Last year, I think this was during the summer, a gas field worker near Durango (Colorado) was soaked in some kind of chemical liquid while working. So, he went into the ER and was all messed up. They took him into their hosing-off room, and hosed him off. He got fixed up, and was sent on his way. (Or so I think, I'm not TOTALLY sure about what happened to him.)

However, the nurse who had worked on him got really sick shortly thereafter. She almost died because her heart, liver, and respiratory system essentially stopped working. She also lost her sense of smell.

So, when she was at the hospital getting treated for these mysterious symptoms, the doctors are all freaking out - what the fuck did that gas field worker have on him anyway? How many other people sitting in the ER that day were exposed to him? How were they supposed to help this nurse when they had no clue what was going on?

Guess what the oil and gas company did. That's right! They REFUSED to tell doctors what chemicals were on the worker who was in the ER. They said it was a TRADE SECRET! This nurse, who saved the oil worker, was DYING from exposure to these mystery chemicals, and (not surprisingly, but still disturbingly) the oil company was more worried about protecting the secrecy of what the chemicals were. Seriously, outrageous. I can't imagine the frustration of the people who were actually involved with all of this.

Whatever the chemicals are, they are also going into water sources near (and some not so near) oil and gas fields. Water I've been drinking since living in CO. Of course, the oil industry has always been very loosely regulated - the environment, public health, wildlife - that all takes a backseat to money, which grows on oil fields, you know. The time has come to put that to an end.

So, what are you supposed to do about it? You can start by going here, and sending off an e-mail to the Colorado government, who is trying to actually regulate this horrible industry. But, it is a tough battle, even for a government that wants to do good. There are always trade-offs, and those always benefit the oil industry. You can changed the already-filled-in message to say something like "I'm not a Coloradoan, but my friend lives there, and drinks the water there, and I'd like to someday visit Colorado without the landscape being destroyed by oil fields. Please oppose any effort to delay or water down stronger regulations for the oil and gas industry."

Then, you can pay attention to what is going on in your neck of the woods and demand that your State government regulates these industries and protects our health (which will also protect the environment). Ignorance is not bliss when your drinking water and your air is giving you and your family cancer. Find out what is going on in your city, and change it.

It's for your health.

Countdown, Commence!

2009-03-03T19:22:00.004-07:00

In one more month, I am outta here! April 3 is my last day of work, and my old man is flying in that night, and we are starting the road trip back to SD that weekend. Yes. Only one month until everything is back to normal. The only things that I will sort of miss are my bike ride, because San Diego has too many dumb hills and the bike path doesn't just go purely along the river like I wish it did, and dumb Max, even though I hate him. But, I actually won't miss those things, I will just not feel hate when I think of them. Except Max.

I'm still working on planning the road trip, but so far I think there will be stops in the following places:

Santa Fe, NM (because of Newsies). I will also probably have to make a quick stop in Albuquerque, because of Bugs Bunny.
Petrified Forest National Park
Flagstaff, AZ
Grand Canyon
Phoenix, AZ

So, if you know of anything cool to do or see in any of those places, or anywhere along the path from Denver to San Diego please let me know. I hate Google and can't stand to try and look stuff up on there. Plus, I don't trust the common man's opinion - but I trust yours.

Anyone know of a good place to hire and ride a horse on the South Rim of the Grand Canyon?

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Now playing: New Found Glory - Such A Mess
via FoxyTunes

Weekend in Review

2009-03-01T19:24:00.003-07:00

Fixed the stance on my snowboard. It is perfection now.
Spent 3 hours in traffic trying to get to Breck. With no music. And the car behind me had squeaky brakes. Luckily, I was smart enough to bring a grilled cheese sandwich with me at least..
Rode some nice soft pow, even though it was already tracked out and the mountain was packed.
Found an awesome run that has the potential to be the best pow run I've ever found, if I can somehow get to Breck before it gets tracked - I will probably just lap this run every time I go from now on.
Studied for the multi-state professional responsibility exam that I'm taking next Sat. Basically, a test about lawyer ethics. Supposedly impossible to fail, but I know people who have done it. They didn't actually try though.
Got some tamales to-go from this bomb restaurant, only to find out they gave me pork ones. Donated them to the people upstairs.
Went to The Container Store to use a coupon, and made it out only spending $10.
Made the best taco salad ever.
Played Animal Crossing.
Cleaned my cave.

A New Found Glory - Hit or Miss

via FoxyTunes

One More Week!

2009-02-27T20:54:00.003-07:00

In one week, I will be at the most-anticipated show of the year! One of my long-time faves, Jimmy Eat World, will be playing Clarity in its entirety. By a stroke of luck, I purchased Clarity the year it came out, at the tender age of 16. I say it was a stroke of luck, because I had never heard of Jimmy Eat World, and bought the CD on a whim at Backside. I don't remember, but there must've been some sort of sign saying it was good or something - regardless, something drew me to it, and I got it. I loved it at first listen, although it was much slower than pretty much everything else I was listening to at that time. The song that inspired this blog's url is on that album. My screen name for every single thing that allows enough characters for it is from that album - onesmallinstrument. When I get a job, I will have a tattoo inspired by this album. This album is life.

It's hands down their best album, but I'd even venture to say it is the best overall album of any band I like. It is sort of like Pinkerton - although the critics didn't care about it, and the mainstream didn't care about it, everyone who matters knows it is the best thing ever, and could never be replicated. Hmm...if I had to pick either Clarity or Pinkerton to exist, I don't know which I would pick...but Weezer fell from grace hard, so I guess I would pick Clarity just because JEW is still good. Maybe. I don't know.

So, when I found out about this tour where they will play the entire album straight through in celebration of its 10 year anniversary, Bear Bear and I conversed, and we decided I would go and buy tickets the instant they went on sale at House of Blues, to save Ticketmaster fees, naturally. He was worried it would somehow instantly sell out, and we wouldn't get tickets. When I got to HOB, there wasn't a line wrapping around downtown San Diego or anything crazy like one would expect for such a historically awesome event. By the time I parked and walked over there, though, a few people were waiting. I was the second person to get JEW tickets at the venue. The whole tour (only ten dates) later sold out.

I have been waiting for this night (not THIS night, next Friday night) ever since I got those tickets, but truly I have been waiting for it since I was 16. Bear Bear, my partner in music, was a mere 14. We were babies. And now we are full growns, about to have real careers and pay bills and be adults and everything, and this album is STILL life. If you don't know what saying an album is life means, then you have never heard an album that is life. That is the only way to describe this. I think I will probably explode from pure joy and anticipation. And with all the other people there who feel like this, all singing, it is going to be going off. It is going to be the happiest I've ever been, with my old man, Bear Bear, and his old lady. I CAN'T WAIT!

I'm also going to be on the lookout for Mark Hoppus at the show, who I know is an avid JEW fan, and is an especially avid fan of Clarity, and either lives or lived in San Diego. If I somehow talked to him and told him Clarity is life, he would know what I mean. For sure. Of course, he won't be mingling with us mere mortals, but I have a good sidestage eye. And, I just found out, via his Twitter, that he plays Animal Crossing (or someone in his house does) - so that means I am not a total dork for playing it! Booyah.

"Take in restraint, like a breath, my lungs are so lung from holding in baaack!!!"

----------------
Now playing: Jimmy Eat World - Crush
via FoxyTunes

Interesting Things About Me

2009-02-26T12:00:00.000-07:00

To commemorate my 50th post, I'm going to give you a list of 25 interesting things about myself. At least, I think they are interesting. Why 25? Because they are long, and it got annoying.

The early years: Birth - 5 years or so.

In kindergarten, I learned my school's song. It went "Up in the mornin', the early mornin', down to the bus stop, backpacks a borgin'..." (that's all I remember). Of course, borgin' isn't a word, but I just thought it was a word I didn't know yet. So, I stored that word away in my mind and waited until the day I would learn what it meant. Then, a few years ago, I was thinking about this song, which I did my entire life, from time to time, and I realized the correct lyrics were "backpacks a bulgin'"! It was the greatest revelation ever.
My Grandma Toody and I would play with snails, and race them. I would keep playing this with her even after I was bored of it, because I knew it made her happy to play with me.
My littlest brother, Bird, was terrified of this big fan at my Grandma Chac's house. To torment him, I would put his bottle in front of the fan and then watch his reaction. If you have ever seen a very small child screaming in pure terror, that is what I was going for. And, I got it every time. I wonder how that affected him in the long run.
When I had bad dreams, I would knock on the wall that my bed was against, which was also the wall of my parents' room. One of them would then come running. I don't know if they invented that system, or if I did, but it was a good system.
My friend Jeff, who lived across the street, lost a tooth when he bit into a piece of fresh pineapple. There was blood everywhere, all over the pineapple. I can remember it very vividly, it was crazy.
My brother, Bear Bear, would watch Robin Hood and eat a peanut butter & jelly sandwich everyday. It was the most annoying thing ever.
I used to eat pinches of fish food flakes. And I kept doing it for a little while after my parents told me to stop, and I don't think they knew. They should've just told me what it was made out of, and I would've stopped.
I remember my first earthquake clearly. It happened before school, and the TV turned to static and really loud white noise. I vividly remember how it looked and sounded, and I was more scared of that than anything else.
I can remember the way I would think about things, especially the way I thought about how people acted - even as a very small kid. My thought process is exactly the same, still.
For as long as I can remember, I've always known my mom is a genius. She seriously knows the answer to every question I've ever asked. She is even smarter than Google.
My parents would cover the coffee table with butcher paper, and we would draw allll over it. It was the greatest thing ever, and my dad was the best artist in the world. Somehow, I don't think any of us kids inherited his artistic talent, although I tried so hard to be good at drawing for many years.
I hated the Velveteen Rabbit because after I knew the story I was always worried that if I got sick all of my stuffed animals would have to be burned.
In the room I slept in at my Grandma Chac's house, the ceiling was that weird cottage cheese texture stuff. I could see faces in it, and I pretended one of the faces was my Grandpa, who died before I was born. I would look at that face and wonder if he would like me.
My Aunt Jackie's house was seriously the craziest place in the world to me. Everything there was old, and everything people said and did there was crazy. They cooked a whole pig in the dirt!
I was the flower girl at my cousin's wedding, and I was too shy to throw a single petal.

Elementary School: 6 years - 12 years or so.

I got my tonsils out in second grade.
I broke my arm in fourth grade, playing "monster" with my dad. The hospital was suspicious, and kept my parents out of the room while they set my broken arm (the most painful thing in the world), so they could ask me how it happened and make sure it was just an accident during a game. Then, they didn't set it right and had to do it again. It was horrible.
In second grade, I was chosen to do the "hussle" (the dance) with other kids in front of the parents on some day when they came to the school.
I liked taking art classes after school. Bear Bear and I took a class where we decorated awesome shirts with puffy paint (mine was a dog, siting in a floaty ring in the ocean, next to an island, and it said "California Dreamin'"), and a class where we made jewelry.
I started playing soccer starting in first or second grade, after I had played it at recess and loved it.
In second or third grade, I was sick with pneumonia and missed the mile run for the Presidential Fitness Awards challenge. When I got back to school, I got to do a make-up run, during class, just me and the P.E. teacher. I wasn't fully healthy though, just getting over being sick, so I could barely run without feeling like I was going to die. For some reason, I didn't want to tell the teacher I couldn't do it, and I desperately wanted the Presidential Fitness Award, so I just kept going. Eventually, she realized I was going to die - I may have started crying, I don't remember - and she said I could get the award without finishing because she knew I could do it.
My favorite things to do at recess were: monkey bars, soccer, kickball (against the wall), and handball.
I once got "benched" because I missed the wall while playing kickball, and the ball went flying across the playground and hit one of the "yard duties" right squaw on the top of her head. (We called her Blanca - Bear Bear started that). The whole time the ball was bouncing across the playground, I was yelling "watch out, head's up", etc., but stupid Blanca didn't look. Obviously, it wasn't intentional (even though it was funny), and I tried to avoid it, so I clearly didn't deserve the punishment. It was the only time I got benched in my elementary school career.
In fourth grade, I wasn't allowed to play with my two best friends (JoLynn and Jenny) because they had gotten into a fight and JoLynn told Jenny "at least I have a dad", because Jenny's dad had died before she was born. So, why couldn't I play with them? To this day, I have no idea. I had absolutely nothing to do with the fight, I never fought or argued with anyone, I was a perfectly shy, quiet, student who never did a single thing wrong - or would ever even think of it! All three of us had gone to a meeting with the school psychiatrist, and the principal, and the vice principal, and we were told that we couldn't play with each other any more, and if anyone saw any of us even talking to each other, we would be suspended. Of course, I didn't understand how I had gotten involved in this - I don't think I was even there when the fight happened. At recess, I would just sit against this wall by myself, all depressed, I didn't know what to do. It wasn't that I couldn't play with two of my friends, it was more that I didn't feel like playing at all because I was sad. My parents knew what had happened, and I knew they thought it was dumb, and of course I didn't get in trouble from them, but I don't think I let on how mad it made me so they had no reason to make a bigger stink. I don't remember how long that went on, but eventually my teacher noticed, and found out what the school psychiatrist had done and how I didn't know what I did wrong and I didn't understand why I was being punished, and it ended. I think that whole situation really affected me, obviously, and I still feel pure hate when I think about that school psychiatrist who didn't know what she was doing.
I didn't lose a tooth until fourth grade, and by then they didn't have those tooth calendar things on the wall, where kids would get to put up a tooth with their name on it when they lost one. So, I never got to do that.

Address Thoughts

2009-02-25T14:34:00.004-07:00

Last night I was forced to watch Obama's address to the joint session of Congress because I wanted to watch The Biggest Loser (AKA "The Big Fat Loser", as one of my ditzy Mammoth roommates mistakenly called it), but the address was on instead. I normally hate watching these things because all the standing and clapping is so contrived that I just can't stand it. And seeing members of Congress lined up to get the President's autograph is ridiculous too. But, it wasn't so bad this time, since it wasn't Bush telling people a bunch of lies in broken English, if you can even call it that.

It probably doesn't show too much in this blog, since I avoid the topic of politics most of the time - believing that everything I think is right, and if you don't agree with me, then there is no point for me to talk to you because you won't change my mind, and I won't change yours - but, I'm actually quite interested in politics. One professor I had put it perfectly. He said he doesn't tell people he is a political theory professor because as soon as the topic of politics comes up, he either has to tell the other person everything he thinks about politics, or he can't even stand to talk to them and just says nothing - "both are obnoxious." I got my undergrad degree in political science (totally pointless as far as a job search goes, but it was what I was interested in). I'm subscribed to many political news feeds, which I never leave "unread", now that I have more free time to read since I'm not in school. So, I do know what is going on, and feel like I can talk to just about anyone about most political topics competantly, even though I don't. Now that I think about it though, this post isn't really that political.

But, enough about me and how great and smart I am. What I wanted to say is that I really liked what Obama said about education. I was, however, careful to not let him hypnotize me (success!). After the environment, education is definitely the most important issue to me. Every single day I am astounded by the stupidity of the average person. I don't know why I continue to be astounded, I should be used to it by now, but I guess I just expect more out of people and haven't completely given up on them yet. If you listen to what people say, or read what people say in these blogs with triple-digit-readership (a-whole-nother issue that drives me crazy) - it is maddening. Hardly anyone understands how to use the English language, and I'd say the average person has no interest in learning more about the world. They are content to be the sterotypical dumb American. I can't understand not wanting to learn. I feel like I could never learn enough. If I can't find a job after graduation, I plan to take some online classes until I'm employed for real. I don't know how I would have lived before Al Gore invented the internet, because I am constantly looking up things to learn more about them.

So, when Obama said that it is an American's duty to graduate from high school and pursue a higher education (or something to that effect), I liked that. And, I'm glad he said that we need to put more money into education, into re-building schools, and into making it easier for kids to afford going to college. We are so far behind the rest of the world, and he was right - if the rest of the world has a better education than we do, then the economy will continue to suffer because how can we invent new technologies and stuff if we barely have a high school education? We can't keep relying on re-paving roads to keep the economy going. Plus, anyone who has gone to high school knows that they barely even teach you anything there, anyway, so that has to be totally reformed.

And, I don't even think that everyone should go to college, because I know it isn't for everyone, and I think that an undergraduate degree doesn't give a person a broad enough education. Plus, a lot of the classes still don't teach you much. So, I really liked it when he asked all Americans to commit to one year of higher education - whether it is college classes, or vocational training, or an apprenticeship, or trade school - just learn.

I mean, even if you can't do any of that, you can still commit to reading one book a month (two would be better!), or something like that. And, a real book, as in literature. No, Skinny Bitch doesn't count! If you want to be a better writer, the first thing you should do is read! And don't say you don't like reading - you just haven't found the right book yet.

Or, you can Google everything you wonder about and read what the internet has to offer on the topic...just don't rely solely on Wikipedia! Or, you can subscribe to a variety of Google Reader feeds and learn a little bit about a lot of different things every day - I'm subscribed to a bunch of news, politics, travel, food, and environmental feeds that I read through every day. I'm even subscribed to a feed that teaches little things about Japan (culture and language), and I'm actually starting to understand and recognize some Japanese words. Or, you can just learn a new skill - like sewing, playing guitar (or any other form of art), figure out a new computer program, or something like organic gardening.

JUST LEARN SOMETHING NEW! Anything. It will make such a postitive difference in this country, and there will never be another Bush. If you aren't learning you're stagnant, and that is an insult.

So, hopefully Congress will get it together and write some good, honest legislation to get this education problem under control. Then maybe I'll be able to tolerate the general public, instead of being a know-it-all elitiest.

Hips, Thighs, & Ass

2009-02-24T16:39:00.003-07:00

Ah, as you can see above, it is hot here this week! This is the equivalent of if it was in the 80s in San Diego. I was able to ride my bike to work with only a t-shirt. And pants, naturally. On the ride home, I was boiling alive. Thankfully my arms have finally seen sunlight. It has been so long, I'm so pale I'm purple. If I had been crazy enough to pack any, I think I even could've gotten away with wearing shorts today. Which has made me realize that these jeans will make the perfect pair of cut-off shorts this spring. It's weird that you say "pair" even though it is only one shorts. It would be so weird to say they will make a perfect shorts, though. Hmm. They (English professors) must count the legs. But, they don't call it a pair of shirts, and shirts have two sleeves.

Anyway. I've given up on buying shorts from stores. Every pair I try on seem like they were made for a pre-pubescent junior high girl that has not yet developed the hips, thighs, and ass that a 26-year old has. Either that, or they are made for an older lady with even more substantial hips, thighs, and ass, whose desire for looking cool has morphed into a desire for comfort and thrift. Also - I don't think any junior high girls should be wearing shorts as short as these ones I have tried on. I'm not sure anyone is the appropriate age for shorts that short, and I'm sure my old man, and my brother, and every other guy in the world will disagree. Except fathers.

Hopefully I am not the only one that has noticed this shorts dilemma, but then why don't they (the sweatshop workers?) make shorts that fit normal people with actual bodies. At least, they don't have any at any stores where I can afford to shop (Kohls, Mervyns (R.I.P.), the clearance rack at REI and Sport Chalet). Until then, I'll keep upcycling my jeans into shorts each spring - they fit much nicer, are free, can be as short or as long as I like, and by the time they are ready to be shorts they are perfectly worn in and comfortable. Plus, people probably think I look cool.

The Same Old, Same Old

2009-02-23T17:49:00.003-07:00

No updates recently because nothing new or interesting ever happens here. Every day I go to work, then come home and watch tv, play video games, and read until it is time for bed. Every. Single. Mingle. Day. It is so boring.

I've also been sick for like...11 days. I have no appetite, but am constantly starving. I try to cater to my every whim, but I am disgusted by everything I eat. I don't even want the things I always want when I'm sick. Like McDonalds cheeseburgers without meat. But that might be because I had that last week, so my cravings have been quelled.

Then today, I decided the only thing I wanted to eat was potstickers. So, after work, I went to Safeway to get some. I went down the frozen foods aisle, and although they had EVERY flavor of those nasty pizza roll things, there were no potstickers! But, luckily I realized upon turning the corner that there was a-whole-nother aisle of frozen food. Who knew there was so much frozen food...it must be using up tons of electicity. Anyway, again, I couldn't find the stupid potstickers. I was so mad I was ready to murder the next person who crossed my path - after all, I had driven all the way to the store just to get these potstickers, and they were the only things I was going to eat. But, before any murders took place, I found them. Except there were no vegetable ones left! However, I climbed into the freezer and found some in the waaaay back behind the nasty chicken ones. Yay! And, they even had the kind of sauce I like to put on them - La Choy.

I just got done devouring them, and I made enough to take them in my lunch tomorrow. They were so good! The only thing I've enjoyed eating for a week! Now I am just trying to force myself to save the extra I made for lunch tomorrow. Tempting. They weren't as good as if my old man had made them though. He is the master of cooking anything that requires a skillet, Asian cuisine, and pot pies. But you have to watch him or he'll make everything too spicy for every pallet but his.

The Grandest of Canyons

2009-02-19T12:32:00.004-07:00

I am looking for advice on visiting the Grand Canyon and surrounding area. Our plan is to drive from Denver to San Diego, with a Grand Canyon detour. We have about 8 days to spend on the trip. We want to tent camp and care more about scenery, hiking, and opportunities to see rare/cool animals more than any other ammenities. (Do armadillos live there?) If anyone has stayed there in recent times and has any recommendations on where to camp, do tell. Recommendations on cool hikes, and places where armadillos might be living are also encouraged.

Same goes for Glen Canyon.

We'll be doing this the first week of April. Hopefully there won't be a lot of dumb annoying tourists there then. Besides us.

The internet has ruined itself, making it impossible to Google stuff about the Grand Canyon without coming up with a bazillion people trying to snare me in a tourist trap. It is virtually impossible to find any real information, and until I have time to go buy a book about it (I lost my library card, most likely instantly) I am relying on you for information. Just like people would have done before Al Gore invented the internet. God, I love him.

Work It Out Weekends III

2009-02-15T12:01:00.002-07:00

Well, it turns out that NOTHING is worth sprinting for. I got sick the day after I sprinted in the snow. In hindsight (or is that two words?), it wasn't worth it. All the people at my work are also sick, so they are also to blame - but I still lay some blame with sprinting in the snow, which is obviously a bad idea. Needless to say, the sickness has altered my health plan. But who cares.

The Dude Abides:

Rode my bike every day even though it was freezing cold, snowing, and icy...until I got sick on Thursday.
Walked all far to work on Thursday even though I was sick.
Stayed within my calorie (I always want to spell that "calory"...it is sickening) goals every day, until I stopped keeping track (Friday night).
Drank a lot of water for most of the week.

Mark It Zero:

I bought a sandwich on Tuesday, which I allow myself one restaurant purchase per week. I was going to get a five dollar footlong - I just can't resist that song. But, then as I was walking to Subway I thought I'd rather get a panini from Corner Bakery. I knew that when I got that panini last week I decided that I would get Subway next time because Subway is healthier. But, as I was walking I thought that I know Subway is like 150 calories less than the other sandwich, and it is way bigger, but I'd rather use the calories and eat the tastier, smaller sandwich. So, I got the panini instead. Then, when I got back to work and entered the nutrition info in, I realized that the true reason I was supposed to get Subway is because it has WAY less fat...like 30g less fat. I had failed to think about the fat, and was only thinking about the calories. Oops. It didn't matter though, I just ate healthy for dinner.
Stopped keeping track of food on Friday night. I might go back and enter it in, just to keep my streak going, but I don't know.
Haven't been drinking as much as I should, especially for someone who is sick.
Didn't do the gym or the wii fit. But, I'm sick.

Coraline, Coraline, How Does That Song Go?

2009-02-15T11:56:00.002-07:00

Last night we ended up skipping The Sleeping show because they jacked up the prices for day-of tickets - which is unacceptable. We did still get Del Taco though, it was delicious. Obviously. And we went to Vons and got some Port wine and some of Grandma Chac's old cough medicine (Sutter Home White Zin) because they were cheap. The Port was the sickest thing ever. It is like drinking thick, sweet, syrup laced with cheap red wine. Yucky. And, I was too sleepy to drink the Grandma Chac's...so we're going to drink it tonight and play Yahtzee. Basically, the ultimate night for Grandma Chac.

This morning the old man is making breakfast, and I'm not helping so we'll see how it turns out. He's been baking bread since he has been batchin' it (that doesn't translate as well in typing - batchin' it means being a bachelor and is stolen from Little People Big World's Matt Roloff) and has become quite the baker. Then, we're going to go see Coraline in 3D. And....I don't know what else we'll do today, but it will probably be awesome.

I Arrived Safely

2009-02-14T21:17:00.002-07:00

I made it to San Diego safe and sound. First things first, I did the usual California homecoming ritual and ate some dank In-N-Out. Then, today we went to the only Chinese restaurant I love, Dumpling Inn. We were going to the zoo, but decided we were too tired and Adam had to come home to do physics. Then we ate some waffle ice cream sandwiches. They weren't as good as I remembered. I actually don't think I'll eat them again. Then we played Yahtzee, and I won three games in a row, which is unprecedented. Now, we're going to go to see The Sleeping play at Soma. And, I think I'll trick Adam into letting us get Del Taco after...which I will have to buy since I bet him I would get a Yahtzee on my next roll, and lost. Twice.

Jiggity Jog

2009-02-13T17:23:00.003-07:00

Yay! Tonight at 8:45 stupid Denver time I will be on my way back to San Diego for the 3-day weekend! So long, dumb, annoying, boring, pointless, freezing Denver! I gotta get back to SD, where this thing is waiting for me:

This isn't what he looks like now, but he has looked like this. I am expecting him to look like Mini Richard Simmons now. And I know he has some sick moustache that has been growing for months.

The Only Thing Worth Sprinting For

2009-02-10T16:48:00.003-07:00

This is what I saw going up the hardest hill on my ride home from work! Yes, it is an actual person riding an actual olde tyme bike! What the heck! Notice, they have a backpack and helmet on and everything - like, they are actually riding this bike, it is not just a novelty for some event. Imagine my luck!

When I first saw this thing, he/she (I think it was a she, but can't be sure) was kind of far ahead of me. So, I broke into a full sprint on my bike - something I would normally never do going up this stupid hill. Not even for money. But, I just haaaad to get a picture of it because I knew no one would believe me otherwise. The blurriness is because (1) I used my cell camera, and (2) I was trying to take these pictures while riding a bike and being mindful of cars. This is one of the greatest things that has ever happened to me.

Today is also the first time I had to ride while it was snowing. It was lightly snowing, but still - snowing. At first, my legs were freezing, but once I got going it actually wasn't that bad. My hands got frozen to death by the time I got home. I'll have to use my heavy duty snowboarding mittens next time. My hands still feel all burny and weird. I decided a few days ago that I was going to ride my bike no matter how cold it was - the only thing that will stop me is ice, because that is just dangerous. And nothing is worth dying for, as Carrie's mom taught me.

Smartily, I left work early to avoid the coming storm. Good thing too, it started coming down a bit harder just as I was on the last couple blocks of my ride. The most annoying thing is getting snowflakes in my eyes. It really wasn't as bad as I was expecting though.

Upgrade

2009-02-09T19:54:00.001-07:00

As you can see, my blog is no longer ugly and boring. My friend J-fer's sister, Lara, made me a nice array of banners to choose from - they're all awesome. So, now I not only have a nice new banner, but I can switch it up if I get bored of this one.

Thanks Lara! Everyone, admire her handy work. Handiwork? Hmm.

Boring + Ugly

2009-02-08T22:34:00.003-07:00

I hate this blog because I don't have a banner. It is boring and ugly. I can't make a banner because I don't have any program to make one with. I spent a loooong time today trying to find a free program to use, but I couldn't easily find anything that will work on this computer. So...if anyone would like to make a banner and donate it to me, I would be grateful. There are no rules, just as long as it says "fourteen weeks" on it and is a normal banner size. Pics from my flickr are up for grabs, or you can just do your own thing. Come on, there must be someone out there looking for something to do! It will only take ten minutes, I swear.

Much obliged.

Work It Out Weekends II

2009-02-08T12:50:00.000-07:00

Welcome to my second week of work it out weekends. I've realized that it is pretty easy to stay healthy when you are forced to ride your bike to work everyday (because all the other options are way more annoying) and once you come home you just stay in the basement - where there is usually no food. Plus, not having any friends makes it easy to avoid eating out (which is always way worse health-wise than cooking). Maybe now that you see the awesome badges I have on livestrong.com, you will be convinced to join me.

The Dude Abides:

Asked to get extra pickle spears instead of the chips that came with a sandwich I got for lunch when I ran out of carrots to bring to work. This is big because I love chips, but luckily I love pickles more.
Earned a badge for logging ten consecutive days of fitness on L ivestrong.com.
Earned a badge for logging fourteen consecutive days of fitness!
Rode my bike to/from work every single mingle day. One day it was so cold I had to wear my balaclava, the rest of the days were nice. Except that one windy day.
Didn't make nachos bell grande, but did eat several tostadas piled high with veg, which I think I love more than nachos bell grande now. Hmm...no I love nachos more.
Stayed within my calorie goal every day.
Went bowling solo on Sunday and did better than last week. (9 games in an hour instead of 8, upped my average to 139.4.)
Ordered a Diet Coke instead of a "drink" when I went to happy hour with the people upstairs.

Mark It Zero:

Didn't play my Wii Fits.
Only took my vitamin one day, and I got sick because my stomach wasn't full enough. Learned not to take chances like that.
Didn't got to the gym.
Ate some chocolates the people upstairs brought me from Costa Rica because Food Network was only playing shows about chocolate all day. But, it actually didn't matter because once I entered it on Livestrong.com, I saw that I still had extra calories for the day.
Ate some of the sickest fries I've ever had in my entire life at happy hour. But, they don't know about vegetarians in Denver, so my only choices were: Fried mac & cheese, fried battered mushrooms, or french fries. Literally, those were my ONLY choices. So, I chose french fries because the mac & cheese was obviously the worst since it was cheese, and the mushrooms were worse because they had batter. The sad part is the fries were DISGUSTING so it was in no way worth it. Good news is I was still below my calorie goal for the day.
Didn't drink as much water as I wanted to (my goal is 3 sigg bottles/day = 96 oz. = 12 cups), but I did still drink a lot of water.

To Be Cliche - There's No Place Like Home

2009-02-07T21:51:00.000-07:00

What I miss most is just being home. This place isn't my home, and doesn't feel like it. It feels like I'm staying at someone else's house for way way way too long. Like when you are hanging out at someone's house and then just get the irresistible urge to go home. You just want to be where you're comfortable and can do whatever you want without caring what anyone else thinks about it.

Where you can eat as soon as you're hungry, get a drink whenever you're thirsty (and use whatever glass you want), and can take up half the couch (or the whole couch, really) if you feel like it. And, you can sing really long, weird songs with tons of cuss words about random stuff (you can even get some harmonizing going), and watch stupid shows that no one would ever admit to watching. And, you don't have to laugh at stupid things that aren't even funny and you don't have to keep your mouth shut when someone is saying something that is TOTALLY wrong - because it isn't rude to be a know-it-all when you are in your own home. Well, not as rude, at least. And you don't have to be extra-polite, you just have to be normal-polite. You can even sometimes be mean and it will be forgiven. And your jokes are understood and appreciated. And you can sneak around in the dark and give your old man the ultimate scare when he goes to the bathroom and thinks you're asleep. And you can talk non-stop, or just be quiet. And you can do all that while wearing some horrible, old, pajama pants, or whatever you want. And when I'm at home I can do all that and my old man doesn't mind.

And you can do this and then yell, "Come take a picture of me! Do I look cool? Do I look like a shark?"

I feel like I'm at someone else's house and I'm ready to go home all the time, and I can never just go home and relax. I can't even truly fully relax in my basement. This is probably TMI, and I make no apologies for it because I think it ends with a laugh, but I have to wear a bra allllll day long just in case I have to go upstairs and get a drink or something because this girl I once lived with in Mammoth used to not wear a bra around the house and it was...let's just say, noticeable.

And, it's not even bad here. This is like the best case scenario. The people upstairs are nice and everything, it's just not my home, and it's not their fault. Even if they were my bffs, after a month, I would be dying to go home. And, it's crazy to think that I still have to go two more months. I have to do what I just did, two. more. times. Ugh.

I Love Sandos

2009-02-06T11:07:00.000-07:00

Last week, the people upstairs were going out of town starting Thursday. So, I took the opportunity to take over the kitchen and do some down-and-dirty cooking. Normally, I try to get in and out as quickly as possible so I'm not being annoying. I decided to make some vegan hickory smoked veggie lunchmeat that I saw on vegandad.blogspot.com. I've also made his vegan meatballs, and they are seriously worth dying for.

The reason I wanted to make this is because when Adam was here we ate a lot of delicious sandwiches from our fave restaurant here, WaterCourse Foods. The sandwiches had super thinly-sliced seitan (vegan "wheat meat") and were perfectly flavorful. I had been craving them ever since, and knew my wallet couldn't keep up with my stomach.

I was a bit weary since I had never made seitan before, but the lunchmeat loaf came out PERFECT! I'm going to add a bit more flavor next time, but I found that if you super duper thinly slice the "meat" and then saute it with some butter and soy sauce, it is so so tasty! It is definitely up the level of WaterCourse foods. My fave sando I've made with it is a BBQ "beef". I slice the "meat" (it must be VERY thin, like so thin that it is pretty much just shredded off the loaf) and then I saute it with some butter and soy sauce, and then add a good amount of BBQ sauce at the end. Put that in a toasted french roll with some avocado and you will be in pure heaven.

Anyway, I'd highly highly recommend taking this on for any vegetarians out there. It may sound daunting, but it is actually really easy. You can get anything you can't find in your local grocery store at Trade Joes or Whole Foods. But, chances are, they'll have everything but the nutritional yeast at your regular store.

Mmm...I LOVE this recipe and can't wait to make it with my old man!

(Sorry, still no pics. My fixed camera should be here today though! Maybe I'll update with a sando pic then...)

Either Lay Down, Or Get Out Of Here.

2009-02-05T17:34:00.001-07:00

My worst enemy is now my only friend here. Dumb old Max. The dog. He is always happy to see me when I get home, and follows me down to my basement and hangs out with me for awhile. Sometimes almost the whole evening. And, I can say whatever I want to him and he doesn't care. He too can't believe that even Donald Trump says this is the worst it's ever been and that everyone is getting pancreatic cancer.

I like him a lot better now that I don't have to deal with his enormous amounts of poop and hair. Which the people upstairs don't clean up nearly as often as my old man did.

What An Hour, What An Hour

2009-02-02T17:12:00.000-07:00

Man, the past hour has sucked. It was nice and sunny this morning - cold, but sunny - so my bike ride wasn't too bad. But, on the way home, it was cloudy, cold, and WINDY. I hate wind more than any other weather thing. With pure, pure hate. Not only that, but I had to ride against the wind the entire way home. Well, that isn't true. Once I started going up the worst hill on my ride, the wind was blowing full force at me sideways. So, I had to ride up this stupid annoying hill, my body boiling, my poor little face freezing, whilst leaning into the wind to stop myself from being pushed over. It was horrible. I could barely breathe, and then I was sweaty so I was freezing in the cold wind. The sucker in front of me had to get off and walk up the hill. It was bad.

Then, I almost got hit by a woman driving a stupid big dumb red truck ON A CELL PHONE, not paying attention, turning into my lane. Nothing could make me happier than if someone invented a device, to be installed in all cars, that causes the driver to disappear if they try to talk/text on a cell phone while driving. I don't care where they disappear to - the bottom of the ocean, outer space, Narnia. Seriously, how inconsiderate can someone be to not even care that their driving is so impaired that they could KILL another person? Do they not care how sad my family would be? Apparently not. It is pretty commonly known that driving while talking on a cell phone is just as dangerous as driving drunk, yet people still do it and think nothing of it. And that goes for all the bluetooth-wearing douches too - that is just as dangerous as actually holding a phone! Duh!

So, since I was already in some mood, I decided to try calling Canon to see what they can do about my camera situation. After going through the usual "Blah blah blah, you'll have to call back during a time when you are at work because we really don't care at all about your time, there is nothing we can do, I am a total fuck-up that hates life and wants to make everyone else equally as miserable, etc., etc." I was able to talk to a manager who was actually very nice and helpful. Although, he did give me a spiel implying that I did actually break the camera and that he was just doing this as a "one time goodwill". I accepted the spiel and just said "okay, thank you" because I knew it didn't matter in the end who he thinks broke the camera, as long as I don't have to pay for it. So, now they are going to fix it for free and send it back to me sometime next week. I still vow to never buy from Canon again.

And now I'm starving so hopefully the people upstairs aren't in the kitchen, or heads will roll.

Leslie Needs

2009-02-02T12:58:00.000-07:00

Carrie did this last week, and hers was really funny, so I wanted to do it too. I don't think mine is as funny as hers though. Apparently, other bloggers are doing it too, but I'm oblivious. So, you just go to Google and search for "(your name) needs" and then post what comes up.

Leslie needs a home.
Inquisitive Leslie Needs Lots of Attention ... Leslie has a friendly, sweet personality, but he needs help with his social skills. He's quite open, very inquisitive and likes to repeat things. Sometimes he upsets other children by intruding on their space.
I think Leslie needs some lunch.
Leslie needs to know what the "G" TV ad with all the athletes is about. (Me: Gatorade, dumb - pay attention.)
Leslie needs to be a little more aggressive at times but is generally very solid.
Leslie needs to find a place in Paula's life where she does in fact have commitment.
I was disappionted in this DVD. I think this is great for beginning walking and toning, but not for imtermidiate or advanced. Leslie needs to put BEGINNER on the cover of this one.
Contact us about YOUR Leslie needs today!
Leslie needs sleep! But first a glass of wine.

And that is all I could do before I lost interest. Actually, I lost interest after #3, but forced myself to keep going. Plus, other people's stupid blogs kept coming up, and that got annoying too. I wish I had never started this.

Work It Out Weekends!

2009-02-01T16:30:00.000-07:00

The above banner was stolen from yourwishcake.com, with permission - don't trip.

I got the idea to do this from Ashley, who got it from Kerri at yourwishcake.com. Steph is doing it too. And probably a bitch ton of other people I don't even know about yet. I like it because it's a good way to reflect on what you did during the week. Then, you can feel good about the good stuff you did and feel shitty about the bad stuff you did so you don't keep doing it. Hopefully the good will usually outweigh the bad. Also, since I am telling you all about it you will leave me comments like: "Awesome job, keep it up girl!" or "Don't worry about those nachos bell grande you ate - they are delicious and worth it!" or "Daaaaang, you are looking good!". Etcetera. I invite you to join the club.

Part of it is you have to think of a way to say that you did something good, and that you did something bad. And, it has to be something that no one else has thought of yet. This was a tough one for me.

The Dude Abides:

Didn't make nachos bell grande. Mmm...nachos bell grande.

Ate nasty carrots, grape tomatoes, and an apple everyday for my snacks at work - even though I got sick of it and the apples were too sour for my liking.

Drank a V8 everyday. Mainly to avoid getting punched in the face, and then told "Could've had a V8!"

Kept track of my food on livestrong.com everyday AND stayed below my caloric goal everyday - without even really having to try thanks to all the exercising I've done.

Walked all far to work/the bus on Mon, Tues, Wed in the freezing ass cold.

Didn't eat a grilled cheese sandwich on Tuesday night, even though I was DYING to because I had already used my allotted calories for the day. And it would've gone perfect with the vegetable lentil soup I made.

Rode my bike to/from work on Friday, the only day weather permitted.

Went snowboarding alone on Saturday, mainly for the exercise.

Went bowling alone on Sunday.

Mark It Zero:

Put Ranch dressing on way too much stuff. As in, put Ranch dressing on virtually everything. This is why I don't even allow Ranch into my kitchen. But, what's a girl to do when it is already there? Curse you Hidden Valley! (Note: Once I realized I was doing this (on Wednesday), I stopped and haven't used Ranch since!)

I didn't take my vitamin. But, I did carry it around in my pocket for four days. Then it got all dingy so I decided it would be gross to take it, so I threw it away. See, I get nauseous from all medicines/supplements/vitamins unless I have a full stomach. I'm very sensitive. So, my plan was to carry the vitamin around until I had a full stomach, at which point I would take said vitamin. I kept forgetting though.

Didn't go to the gym. My excuse is that my ipod shuffle isn't charged, and I don't have a charger, and I'm waiting for the one I ordered on ebay to get here. Have you ever tried working out at the gym without music? It is impossible. Plus, I forgive myself because I exercised every single mingle day.

Only played my Wii Fits one day. Because by the time I got home I was too annoyed and starving from the bus ride/bike ride, and the thought of doing Wii Fit was too much to handle.

For How Many? Just One.

2009-02-01T14:56:00.000-07:00

Last Sunday Adam and I went bowling at this place that has awesome deals on Sunday - just $5/hour and $1 for shoes. Since I am dying of boredom, I decided to go roll by myself today. Plus, bowling is a decent workout (1 hour = 257 calories). I also know it is a good work out because there is this one part of my booty, at the top, that is KILLING me and will stay sore for several days. And, my old throwin' arm is sore. Soreness = getting toned.

At first, I was sad because it is totally lame to go bowling by oneself, and I felt all weird like everyone was looking at me thinking wtf - what is with the weird solo girl with a bomb ass tattoo and a double dare t-shirt? But, after I got a couple of strikes, I stopped caring.

Now, I am what I call a straight-shooter. I don't put any spin on the ball or nothin' fancy like that. I thinking spinning is over-rated - plus, I've never been able to do it. Normally, I roll with a gorgeous 11-pounder, my own personal ball, with "fear me" engraved on it. But, this alley doesn't have 11-pounders, and the only balls that will fit my tiny fingers are 10-pounders. So, it is not prime bowling conditions, but I still did okay.

I bowled 8 games in an hour, which is pretty good I'd say. My average came out to 127.75 points/game. I'm going to keep track and see if I improve by the time I get to go home. I like this bowling alley because it tells you how fast you threw the ball after every roll. This has helped me calculate the perfect throwing speed for roller-polers with maximum effect. (A roller-poler is when you roll it ever-so-slowly to get instant strikes, or for precision shots.) The ideal speed, based on my calculations, with a 10-pounder, is between 11 and 11.5 mph.

There Were 6,000 People On One Tree

2009-01-31T18:23:00.000-07:00

Today I went snowboarding alone at Keystone. Traffic was annoying. But, the point of this post is that I had to ride the lift one time with these three kids that were in ski school. The kid I sat next to immediately started chatting me up. At first I liked him because he said I was lucky to live in San Diego because it's warm there, and I was surprised he knew what San Diego is because I don't think any little kids in San Diego know about Denver. He was probably like 5 or 6. Maybe older or younger, I have no frame of reference.

Anyway, if you've ever been skiing/snowboarding, you know this, but at every ski resort there is an area where people have thrown Mardi Gras beads off of the chair lift onto nearby trees. There are also usually bras and panties in this area - but there weren't in Keystone. So, we go by these trees with beads on them and this kid asks me why the beads are there. I tell him that people throw them there, but I don't know why.

Then, the kid starts telling me all these annoying lies about these beads. Like, one time there was a tree that was so covered in beads that they had to shut down all the lifts because the Lead is bad for trees so the tree was going to die. He didn't know why the Lead was bad, he just knew it was. Just as he was saying that, coincidentally, we went over the tree that it was - at least, he thinks it was the same tree.

He also told me that one time they got all the beads off all the trees and there were 6,000 people all in one tree to get the beads off. I was just thinking how can he be saying all these lies and think that I am going to believe him - do other kids just let him lie like this and not even say anything, or believe it? It is weird how an adult can't tell a little kid to stop lying, or at least say lies that are somewhat believable. I just had to pretend I believed him.

Another kid on the chair, about the same age, said that he found an unopened box of Nerds on the ground while skiing. This, most likely, was true. If it wasn't true, it was at least a believable lie because it isn't that crazy to find stuff that people dropped, and Nerds is a rare candy to talk about. Then this dumb lying kid I'm next to says that the last time he went skiing he found a box this tall (spread his arms has high as he could) and this wide (same thing) and the box was filled with Hershey bars. Who would believe that?! He said that he saw it fall out of this guy's backpack and he said, "Hey, Mister, I think you dropped some snacks!" and the guy said, "That's okay, you can keep it!" The other kids didn't even question this stupid story. One kid, was probably 10 or 11, said, "You're lucky, my brother would've stolen it from me before I got to eat even one." So, she totally believed him!

I was so happy to be rid of him when we got to the top. He wouldn't have been so bad if he would've at least let me talk too - every time I tried to say something he would just keep talking like I didn't say it!

I Don't Know What To Make Of It

2009-01-29T19:59:00.000-07:00

This morning my boss emailed me and said that she was going to the library at lunch, and asked if I wanted to come too and said we could maybe also go to the art museum. Of course, I was like wtf. I have no idea why she asked me this, I have never expressed any interest in libraries or art. The e-mail was worded in a way that I knew it would be weird if I didn't accept, so I said that I'd go with her. I didn't know what to expect.

So, we walk over to the library - it isn't that far away. She asked me what kind of books I like, and instead of saying something that a normal person would say, I just said that I like all kinds of books and I'll just walk around and check things out. We planned to meet back in the lobby in 15 minutes. Now, I have three full shelves of books that I brought with me from San Diego that I seriously need to read. So, of course, I didn't need to be getting any library books. Plus, I'm not a library person. I prefer to have books on my shelf for one or two, maybe three, years before actually getting the time to read them. I'm hoping that at some point the content will just somehow seep into my brain. Also, I'm turned off by the commitment a library relationship entails - I mean, you're required to either read the book AND return it, or remember to renew it, in only two weeks, OR YOU GET FINED! That is far too restrictive for my style of living.

Anyway, first I try using the catalog computer to find The Prosecution of George W. Bush for Murder by Vincent Bugliosi. I walked around for awhile, and couldn't find it. I was getting all hot because I was wearing my walking-around-in-the-butt-ass-cold clothes, and the library was hot enough to be wearing shorts and a tank top. So, I just went downstairs and decided to pick a book off one of the various displays they had around the lobby. After all, I would seem like a total weirdo to my boss if I didn't pick out a book - or so I thought. Why I couldn't just tell her I have a million books at home that I need to read, I'll never know.

Guess what book I picked out? You'll never guess.

The Chris Farley Show. A biography about Chris Farley. I don't know exactly why. I just saw it, and I was so hot, and so confused about why I was even in this library that under normal circumstances I would never be in, that I just got it. I don't know if my boss saw what book I got or not. I don't know what she would think if she did see it. Probably nothing. I don't even know if I'll read it. I pray that I somehow remember to return it, because I am not paying any fines for being forgetful.

Then we went to the art museum. She has a pass, so I got in free. She asked what kind of art I like, I told her "I don't know." The truth is I hate art. I am done pretending that I like art, just to fall in line. Every time I go to an art museum I am just thinking that everything either looks dumb and ugly, or is cool but I don't understand how it is that cool to deserve being in a museum and to warrant making people pay money to look at it. My idea of cool art is my awesome tattoo, and my Wunderland War toys. And, you can see both of those things at my house, and you don't have to pay any money.

But, we went into the first room and it had all this stuff from Native Americans in it - like awesome totem poles and masks and stuff. It was awesome. But, I wouldn't really think I'd find that kind of stuff in an art museum, I think of that stuff as more History Museum stuff. So, I guess I like some art, but I just hate most art.

An example of art that I don't get. I walk past this thing on my hike to the bus. I don't know what it is, but I know what it looks like.

I still don't know why my boss wanted me to do that with her. It was really strange. Oh, and we only stayed at the museum for about 10 minutes because we had to get back to work. Weird.

My Camera Sitch

2009-01-29T09:55:00.000-07:00

Is messed up.

It all started one fateful day in June 2008, maybe July, when my car window was smashed and purse was stolen from stupid La Jolla High School while I was at gaelic football practice. My camera was in my purse because I was certain I would see the perfect "natural framing" picture at some point, and would take the perfect shot that would win me the Exposaroonie challenge for that week. So, my camera was stolen too.

That wasn't sooo bad because Adam had a camera so we just shared his. Then, right before this trip, his camera lens started being all weird and said some weird error - it was broken. He took it apart though, and then it worked again (although it still made a weird sound). I was pretty sure the weird sound meant it was going to break again at any second, so my mom kindly let me borrow her camera for this Denver situation.

Then, about two weeks ago, my mom's camera lens shudder thing decided to never open again. It was still under warranty because I had just gotten it for her in August. So, I filled out all the warranty stuff online, and sent it in. It was supposed to get back here in 7 days, so I thought no big deal. When Adam went home, I told him to take his camera with him because I'll have my mom's back soon.

This morning I get an email from stupid Canon (who I am now convinced is the worst company ever) saying that it will cost $100 to fix the lens thing! They say there is dent near the lens, but there is no way that is true because (a) my mom barely used it, (b) I was SUPER careful with it and kept it in the case at all times - something I wouldn't even do with my own camera, (c) I fully inspected the camera before sending it to see if I could figure out what was wrong with it and ther was DEFINITELY no dents anywere, and (d) I wrapped it all up in bubble wrap and sent it in a very secure fashion, so nothing could've dented it when I sent it in. Plus, I don't see how a dent would matter when the only problem is the lens shudder won't open - the lens itself pops out and everything.

They want ONE HUNDRED dollars to fix it! You've seriously got to be kidding me. Never before has someone tried to pull a price-gouging of this magnitude on me! I hate Canon and I don't think I will ever give them any more of my money. I've been on the brink of hating them for awhile, and this is the final straw. Google it, they're horrible. Oh, and to buy a new camera would only be $109 right now - the camera is on sale on Amazon. So...they basically want me to pay them the cost of a new camera to fix a camera that is still under warranty and that I am positive has no dent in it.

So, now I have no camera. And, I have to call them and find out how much they are going to charge me to send that broken one back to me. I'm hoping that will at least be less than $50 dollars. Plus, it cost me $9 to send it to them because they wanted me to get delivery confirmation and insurance and the whole nine.

Idiots.