I Passed!

Yippee!

Here's To The Next Chapter

Yes, I'm still here. Just haven't felt like posting. Everything is boring here.

My unofficial father-in-law, Chaz, died from lymphoma a month ago. Only two months after being diagnosed. It is a fucked disease. He loved Reese's Peanut Butter Cups, going to the movies, and running ridiculously long distances in the mountains. He hated barking dogs, Mad TV, and the thought of peeing in a container from bed even if it meant he didn't have to walk to the toilet. He was a genius (complete with crazy quirks), he was stubborn, and he had a great sense of humor. He knew everything about computers, but didn't own one. He once told me he was a technophobe, and I think that was true. You should've seen his microwave - I think it was a prototype one before real microwaves even were truly invented. I'm grateful I got to know him. He had a lot of living left to do, and I'm glad my old man shares a lot of his dad's good qualities (even if it means he also shares that Chaz Stubbornness).

Tomorrow I find out if I passed the CA bar. I've 95% convinced myself that I passed. I had to of passed. If I didn't, dark days are ahead. So, I had to.

If I passed, I get sworn in on December 1. I have to take an oath of professional conduct. Which seems like a joke since every lawyer I've ever heard of breaks every professional conduct rule like it's nothing. People should know, I will TRULY be an honest lawyer. And, I don't need to take a stupid pointless oath to prove that. It's the only way I can imagine being.

If I passed, I can start seriously looking for a real job. The environmental law market is non-existent, so I'm just going to apply for every law job there is and hope I either (a) find something new to love or (b) get enough experience from whatever it is to get me an environmental law job.

Here's to the next chapter.

Altercation With The Baby

I just got home from work, and I'm fuming. My old man isn't home to hear about it, so you have to.

The time is 4:45, and I get a call for a delivery order. This is only my third delivery call of the day, which beats my one delivery for Wednesday. So, I take the order, go back and make the pizzas.

The time is 5:10. I was supposed to be off at 5:00, but of course am going to take this delivery before I go. Just as I'm loading up the second pizza of the order into my delivery bag, the night shift driver walks in. Yes, The Baby (see previous post for background on The Baby). He looks at my delivery and says "you're off, so I'll take that one."

I'm thinking: you've got to be fucking kidding me if you think you're taking this. I say to the assistant manager: do you want me to take this, or should I just go home? He is a little bitch baby who doesn't want to stand up to this fuck, so he says: you guys figure it out, I'm working on something else.

So I say to The Baby: Okay, I'm taking it. As I go to print up the address and everything, he throws a legal fit. Like, two year old style. Practically on the ground writhing.

I say: I've only had two deliveries all day, I took the order, I made the pizzas, it's only 5:10 - I'm taking it.

He says "okay, you take it" and continues to throw his baby fit. He says how I'm taking money away from him now, and he doesn't care that I only had two deliveries because I'm the day driver, and that's my shift, so that's my fault not his. He says that maybe he'll only get four deliveries all night. He says that I was off at 5:00, so I can't take it. He says a bunch of other baby stuff. He is 43 years old.

The whole time he's ranting, I don't say peep. I already said my piece, and I've learned from watching parents dealing with two year olds throwing fits - you just have to let them cry and cry and ignore them.

The assistant manager was standing right there the whole time this is going down, and he doesn't say peep either. Like a coward.

Then, I get back from my delivery and, luckily, The Baby is gone. The assistant manager is all acting like he was on my side, saying what an asshole The Baby is and everything. I'm thinking "gee, thanks for standing up for me and saying something instead of just standing there like an idiot."

I find out The Baby had fourteen deliveries last night. Fourteen. That's like a million dollars. I don't think I've even taken fourteen deliveries in the entire 1.5 weeks I've been there. I'm sure I haven't.

And, The Baby wasn't even supposed to start his shift until 6:00, he just came in at 5:00 because he knew I was off then and thought he'd take my tips for that hour in between shifts. Fucker.

So, tomorrow I think I'm going to talk to the GM and tell him this is the second run-in I've had with The Baby and request that he schedules me right up until 6:00 so this can't happen again. I think I'll also ask him to give The Baby a talkin' to. I am livid.

Tipping Revelation/Revolution

I have strong opinions when it comes to tips and tipping. Now that I think of it, I have strong opinions when it comes to everything. But, that is neither here nor there.

In CA, minimum wage is $8.00. People who work "tip-based" jobs (such as bar tenders, servers, deliver drivers) get paid minimum wage on top of their tips - unlike some other states where tip-based people get like a $2.00 wage or something crazy plus tips. In those states, of course, tipping is fine and necessary for people to live.

But, people in CA with tip-based jobs are getting paid way more than they are worth - in my opinion. Bar tenders end up making more money than teachers. Teachers! Actually, the night delivery drivers at my pizza place probably end up making more than teachers too. That is retarded.

In fact, they probably end up making more than non-profit lawyers!

Is tending bar, delivery driving, or serving people food really worth all the money these guys are making? No way! Do they have any kind of special skill or education to warrant that kind of money-making? No way! Do they even share their tips with the bar backs and bussers and cooks and dishwashers and everyone else who makes their job possible? No way! That is retarded.

I know, I know, they'll say that dealing with customers is the most horrible fate anyone could ever imagine, so they deserve the tips. In rebuttal - go to school or get a skill and get a real job if you hate waiting tables so much. If tipping was banned, I know there are people who would still do the job for just the $8.00/hr. So stop whining, greedy babies.

For these reasons I'm anti-tipping, in CA. People should get paid what they're worth, and people who get tips are getting so over-paid for the jobs they're doing. But, yes, I still leave the standard tip amount because it has become like a crime to not leave a tip - even if you get shitty service and the food is gross, you're still expected to tip. Stupid.

Maybe people should get tips if they actually do something above and beyond. Maybe.

Now, I have a tip-based job. Does this change my tips opinion? No way. I get paid $8.00/hr to deliver pizzas. That's my job, and I do my job and get the wage that a job of that skill level (no skills at all) deserves. My job is to get the pizzas there on time. I don't deserve to get extra money in tips if I get the pizza there on time. Plus, people are already paying a delivery fee too - they shouldn't have to pay the delivery fee and give me a tip when I'm only doing my job.

Actually, now that I have a tip-based job I think even more that tipping is stupid because I can see first hand how easy and stupid my job is and how greedy and selfish the other drivers are. They definitely don't deserve extra money. I am POOR and have a good education and am not just some greedy low life who wants the easiest job for the most money, and I still think tipping is dumb.

(Okay, so maybe all tippees are not greedy low lifes - maybe they're like me and are just between jobs or actually like doing that kind of work, or have some other reason they're doing a tip-based job that is not purely based on wanting a lot of money for doing easy work. But, these exceptions are not enough to justify the tipping system.)

So, I'm not going to be handing anyone back their tip, but if people give me no tip or a crappy tip, I don't blame them. I wouldn't tip me either. I know I don't deserve it for what I'm doing - the easiest, most pointless job ever. And, I don't get the people who give me $10 tips for one pizza - they must just be generous freaks or too drunk/high to realize what they've done.

Maybe I'd change my tune if I got to work the night shifts and made a million dollars a night, but for now, when I'm making only $8/day in tips (on a good day), I'm sticking to this.

I always threaten to stop tipping altogether, to single-handedly start this anti-tipping revolution. Then when the check comes, I become a coward and leave a tip. I'm putting my foot down now, unless I get exceptional service, I'm only leaving a modest tip not the full 15% or whatever ridiculous figure it's up to now. Just look at the jerks who are getting that tip money:

This driver at my work closes five nights a week. He makes as much in one night as I do in an entire week (including my wages and everything). I worked with him, and one other driver on Sunday night. He cried because there were three drivers. "There's never three drivers on Sunday night, I don't know why three drivers are scheduled." The greedy baby didn't want to have to share his deliveries with a third person - even though I'm only getting $2-$8/DAY in tips the four other days I work while he is becoming rich. Then, he threw a fit because I was going to take two deliveries instead of just one - even though the manager told me to take them because this jerk wasn't even there. The jerk walked in as I was about to leave, threw a fit, started telling me how it wasn't fair and blah blah blah. I had to give him the other delivery to stop his tantrum. Complete dick. God forbid I would get an extra $2.00 during my only night shift. Not to mention the fact that I was the only driver who washed dishes and helped make pizzas that night. I let him bully me because it was my first time working with him, and I didn't know he closed every night, so I thought "fine, it's only fair that we each take one delivery at a time, even though this forty year old loser is being a total greedy baby." Next time, he won't be so lucky.

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Delivery Girl Extraordinaire

Well, as was to be expected, I hate my pizza delivery job. I wouldn't hate it so much if I didn't have the super-slow during the day shifts. I got to work for a few hours at night on Tuesday, and it was busy and went by fast and I got good tips. But.

Today I made two deliveries. Two. In seven hours. I only made $8 in tips. That, combined with my $8/hour, is not enough to support my extravagant living-below-the-poverty-line lifestyle. Plus, I figured out that if I had no other expenses whatsoever, the amount of money I will make in one month is not enough to pay one single payment of my student loans - which start in December. Which reminds me - I need to make an appointment to ask the financial aid people what's going to happen to me when I don't pay.

So, F this. I hate being poor. I've learned all I possibly can learn from experiencing true poor-dom, and I'm over it. And yet, I get more and more poor everyday. Example: I worked Tuesday, then spent all the money I made (and then some) on Wednesday, buying black shorts and shoes for my uniform.

I'm scheduled 5 days a week, so I only have one day to go in and work at Coastkeeper, which sucks. My brain is going to disintegrate into pizza sauce.

Someone needs to devise a system where people are just given money based on their character. Then, I'd be a thousandaire, at least. I'd for sure be a hundredaire.

On the bright side, so all you optimists out there can get yours too: I'm scheduled to work Sunday nights, which SUPPOSEDLY makes a ton of tips once football starts. The GM actually does work (including cleaning and other annoying work), unlike all other GMs (and assistant managers) who just sit around like idiots. The other people I've worked with aren't bad or lazy.

Everyone there keeps making jokes about how I went to law school. It was instantly old. Example: Don't say that, remember we've got a lawyer here! You went to law school, so this should be easy for you. Etc. Annoying. Don't remind me I went to law school and now I've been on the floor scrubbing the black grease off the baseboards for three hours. Just let me wallow.

Oh, what have I gotten myself into now!

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Fourteen Weeks

I've got fourteen weeks until I get my bar results - Nov. 20. Until then, I need to stay afloat and do whatever I can to make sure I'll be able to get a law job once I'm admitted to the bar. Times are really tough around here, no doubt.

My scheme:

• I got hired as a delivery driver for Round Table Pizza, $8/hr plus tips. They're only going to give me three days a week, during the day (worst time for tips), but I'm going to try to pick up as many extra shifts as possible and hopefully it will be enough to pay rent and buy food. Who knows when I'll actually start though, this is the most unorganized company in the universe - I have to call them everyday to remind them that they hired me and I have bills to pay. It's almost as bad as working for a movie theatre run by children, which I did as a youth.

• I'm going to do pro bono (free) work for San Diego Coastkeeper as a full-time legal intern. That's where I interned from May-December of last year. This would be my dream job if they could somehow get enough money to hire another attorney. Since they're a non-profit, this is going to take a serious miracle. Operation: convince them they cannot live without hiring me, in full effect. I'm going to be working full-time hours, so I'll pretty much be working on this whenever I'm not delivering pizza to frat boys.

• I'm writing some articles for the Green Scene section of a website for the company my dad is the editorial director for. (http://thegiggleguide.com/biz/features/green-scene) This pays (almost literally) peanuts, so it is mainly just a resume builder and maybe it could open doors for a real job. Plus, it's writing about stuff I'm interested in anyway so that's good. I'm working on an article right now actually, and it is pretty hard to figure out how to write this type of article for a specific audience instead of just writing whatever I want. Getting used to it.

• I'm signed up to take a 5-unit Italian class at a community college two nights a week. Let's be honest - if you're not multi-lingual, what's the point of you? I might have to cancel the class if I can get some night shifts at Round Table, though. But, I like the fact that I can do credit/no credit and then I won't have to care about getting good grades (although my A-addiction will probably force me to care anyway), and if it turns out I have to quit halfway through the semester it won't be a big deal since I've already got my J.D. and this is just for fun anyway. I'm actually hoping a seat in a Japanese class that is full will open up, because I'm more interested in Japanese than Italian. Either way, if I have time I figure the best way to use it is to keep learning.

Bar Done

Well, it's finally over.

I don't get my bar results until November 20. How did it go, you ask? How did I do?

It was crazily, crazily hard. Anyone who passes that messed up test deserves more than just a license to practice law. I know I screwed up on a couple of things, but I got a lot of stuff right, so it just depends on how they grade it and how they scale it I guess.

Let's just say, I wouldn't be completely shocked if I failed and had to do it again in February. But, god, if I have to take that thing again, I'll just die. It was definitely the hardest thing I've ever had to do, and the worst thing I've ever had to do. I can't believe how hard it was. I can't believe people who I would say are complete idiots somehow pass.

After each day, I felt like I had been at Magic Mountain all day, on a really hot day. All nauseous and headachy and tired and dead.

Now, I just have to pack my bags for Tahoe and figure out what the point of me is if I don't have something to study.

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